Castiel X Reader one shots

Even the good days

Word count: 954 words
Warnings: Angst, Break ups, trigger warning, and one cuss word 😂
Key: bold = texts
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You and your boyfriend, Castiel, had had a big fight about how he was never home. Always the same excuse, "Heaven needs help" or "I've got some Angel business to take care of". This was the last straw. You packed your bags, texted Dean asking if you could stay at the bunker for awhile.

Y/N: Hey, Dean. Sorry to bother but is it alright if I stay at the bunker for sometime?

Dean: You're always welcome here, Y/N.

D: Also I heard you and Cas had another fight again. What's wrong?

'What's wrong?' Was never an easy question to answer. I always chose to answer broadly.

A lot.

A lot was wrong. A lot was wrong between you and Castiel. Even the good days. Even the good days, where you and Cas would go out on a date and spend time together. Even when you 2 where cuddling watching tv on a Sunday. Even the good days, you knew something was wrong. You knew he was unhappy. And you knew it was all your fault.

And it wasn't just that you let him down, multiple times, and argued him over and over again. It was that you tied him down, so tightly to you, because he was perfect for you. Even though you weren't perfect for him, not at all. But you wanted him to be happy. It hurt though. It hurt like a bitch. It hurt when you saw him unhappy. You wanted more for Castiel than just you, always you.

What if I left Cas and gave him a second chance? A chance to start over. What would he do? Would he join the Winchesters? Would he go hunting with them? Would he get together with Hannah? Marry her? Marry someone better? Would he be happy? Would he come home everyday, smiling? Would Castiel crawl into bed and pull Hannah or Better-Than-Hannah close to him? Would he fall asleep with his face in the hollow of her neck?... I had gotten so lost in my imagination that I forgot to text Dean back on my way to the bunker.

D: Y/N?

Y/N: Oh, sorry I didn't answer. I was just... thinking. I'm on my way to the bunker now.

You answered, trying to dodge the question he asked you before.

D: Ok, but is everything alright? Sam and I are worried.

Y/N: Yes, Dean. I'm fine. Anyways, Can we go to that diner close to the bunker? I'm starving!

You said as you tried to change topics quickly. Looks like Dean gave up trying to pry the real answer out of you and decided to let it slide.

D: Yeah sure. I'll let Sam know.

* time skip*

You meet up with the boys at the diner. You guys talked for awhile, got all caught up on what they were up to (while avoiding the topic of Cas) and after decided to go back to the bunker, since it was getting dark out. When You guys got home , the Older Winchester went to go to a bar close by and you and Sam went to your rooms. You were emotionally and physically exhausted and decided go to sleep a bit earlier than usual. Before drifting of to sleep you wanted to pray to Castiel to see if you could talk to him and figure things out.

"Hey C-Cas. Uh well I just wanted to talk to you." You say as you start tearing up. "I'm sorry. I'm sorry for always arguing with you. I just- I missed you. I was angry that I couldn't see you, that you were always away..." You were full on crying by now. "I've thought about us. I-i think we shouldn't be together anymore. I know you're very unhappy around me. I know I'm not good enough for you... Please come back." You say between sobs, voice cracking. You waited, a small sliver of light making you hope Cas would show up and tell you none of what you said was true. That he loved you and wanted you to stay with him. That you were good enough. But he never showed up. After waiting and waiting you decided that there was only one thing you could do. You wrote your note explaining why you did this to the boys. Warning them that if they tried to bring you back, you'd be very angry. You got into your car and started driving. Driving to you favorite place on earth. You got there at around 3 am. It was an old abandoned park in your home town. Before your parents were killed by demons, you would all go to the secluded park every weekend. You would have pick nicks, play on the swings, make paper boats and see which one would float on the pond. You had so many good memories there. You knew this is where you wanted your last to be. You layed on the roof of your car and looked at the stars for 2 hours. You saw the sun rise and suspected that the boys were already on their way here to try and stop you from doing this. You look at the gun in your hand and climb into the front seat, putting on your favorite song. You position the gun on your head.

"Last chance,Cas..." You say waiting, Nothing happens. As a tear rolled down your face, you hear a sound. A familiar sound. It was the purr of the Impala's engine.

"Well looks like my time's up... Goodbye. I love you." Your voice cracked. You hear Baby's doors slam and Dean scream your name. You pull the trigger and everything went dark.

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*AUTHORS NOTE*

OMC THAT WAS THE LONGEST FIC I'VE EVER WRITTEN. ALSO SORRY I HAVEN'T UPDATED IN SO LONG. I HAD A BIT OF A WRITER'S BLOCK. BUT IT'S ALL GOOD NOW. CHECK OUT MY NEXT *AN* TO SEE WHY I WON'T BE UPDATING THIS SUMMER.