Don't Hold on too Tight

Chapter 2 - A new life

Jordan's eyes slowly cracked open, and his heart rate quickened. He quickly sat up with his hand on his, still beating, heart. He let out a slight sigh as he looked around. His father was asleep in a seat beside the bed, and it was evident he was in some sort of hospital. With careful hands he slowly tapped his fathers hand and tugged his sleeve. His father opened his eyes and started to rub his face. "How are ya feelin' bud?" He said as he rubbed his tired eyes. Jordan ran his hand through his hair and spoke softly "I really don't know. Good? " he said as he attempted to leave the bed. "Don't-" his father said as he grabbed Jordan's arm. "Stay there, your lungs are weak, and are manually being pumped with oxygen through this" he put his hand on a large machine next to the bed that had a monitor.

After about 10 minutes a doctor had entered the room and handed a packet of papers to Jordan's father "Here you are Mr.Dean." She shifted her eyes toward Jordan, and then back to his father. "Mr.Dean, may I please speak to you outside?" she said as she moved toward the door. "No" he spoke as his eyes moved down the paper. "If you have to say something, say it in front of us both." he looked a Jordan.

"Well, Jordan, we've discovered that you have lung cancer. Both of your lungs are barely capable of breathing on their own." she sighed. "How long have you been dealing with this?"

Jordan thought back to when he first started having a heavy cough. It wasn't as big of a deal back then, and he soon enough had forgotten about it. "Since about 3 months ago" he said as he nervously looked toward the papers his father held.

"That's really not good, this could have been easily treated if found earlier-" she now looked at him worriedly. "but now it's severe, and we have to start chemotherapy immediately." she could barely force herself to say the words. "Jordan, there's a high chance that you've only got a year or so left..." she paused.

It all seemed surreal. As if this were some sick dream and he couldn't wake up. The words hit him like a truck. He felt like throwing up as she spoke. It was as if everything he'd ever looked forward to in life collapsed in front of him. Off to his left, his father had his face in his hands. The tears were dripping from his palms as he sobbed. His little boy, his pride and joy, the one thing he had left in life that kept him going. The little boy he raised to become the young man he is now could possibly be gone. And he'd be left with nothing but anger, self-pity and depression. He just cried, he was speaking but the words weren't forming. All he could do is cry and cry with the thought of his poor son leaving him.

A tear rolled down Jordan's cheek as he saw his father hysterical. The sight of his father, and the thought of the pain he'd cause him if he left hurt more than the fact that he was dying. The doctor took a deep breath. "Those papers explain everything better, and you'll be able to leave in a couple weeks Jordan, but then you'll have to come back a lot." she said as she left the room.

Everything was different now. Never in a million years had he thought he'd be in this situation; barely breathing, barely awake, and barely living. The only thing he cared about was the amount of pain his father was feeling. He was scared, scared to die, scared to lose his future, scared to hurt his dad. This was not only a tragedy, but an awakening. For his life he was thankful, but how long would he be here to tell his father he was going to be okay? "I'm here dad, I'm okay right now. That's all that matters" he said as he cried harder than before, his father stood up and grabbed Jordan in his arms. Jordan buried his head in his fathers chest and they sobbed. "Don't die on me" his father said has he took a deep breathe. Jordan held onto him "I won't" he felt like a liar. His father held him close, and they just cried together.