they did it again
they came up to me.
they pulled my sleeves up.
they told everyone.
why does somebody go so out of their way to hurt somebody they don't care about.
yeah I've cut.
I still do.
I'm not dead.
So why do people treat me like it
Everyone treats me like glass.
They talk so carefully so I won't explode.
except for them.
the ones that think I'm stupid
And crazy
And ugly
And fat
Nobody understands if I wanted to be gone I would.
The things I do help me.
Help me feel happy.
I have bruises on my ribs from them
I've been pushed against lockers
Make that shoved
Just to point out that I have little marks on my arms
It's not much really
Usually music helps.
Usually.
something they don't understand is I want to die
I have no desire to live
But I think about the people that love me
I can count them on one hand
But they want me to stay alive
I think about that
The promises I've made
When I am having a bad day
I want to die but instead
Do something that helps me coax
My counselor explained this brain shit that when you harm it calms you
And it's true
I am the happiest person
After
there is only one group of people that
Accept me
That's the people like me
Some will show off they're sadness
It angers me
So I usually am alone
Most just pass by me
Others
Laugh and point
Some come up to me
Aren't you that emo girl
Nobody obviously knows the definition of emo
In high school
There is only one kid that is nice but I never talk to him
He thinks I'm weird
He wears black skinny jeans
But that doesn't mean he understands
I've been to an asylum
It's ok
There
But you don't get better honestly
Just learn how to lie
Better
At least it's better than middle school
They were worse
I've stood up a few times
It doesn't work
So I get sad
And I do the one thing that makes me feel decent temporarily
My name is hazel
And if you don't understand what I do
I suggest you do not jump into the story of my life.
I don't care for your opinion so save it
Right now I'm a paper bag in the wind
Going wherever it takes me
And I don't care where I end up
As long as it's away from everyone
_________
I just wrote this chapter like she is looking back
This will be the only one like that..
I hope you guys like it.
And may the writing begin
