BROKEN

CHAPTER I

VANESSA SPENCER

"Are you going to stop doing that!" I screech at my best-friend who is currently bouncing like a maniac on my bed. 

"Then wake up, my little poppet!" Megan retorts but doesn't stop with her bouncing.

"I am up! "I mumble. Turning, I bury my face into my pillow.

"I mean wake up, to see the beautiful birds chirping, the sunlight streaming through the windows and the beautiful smell of flowers bloom-" 

She stops suddenly and instantaneously a 'gurgling' sound resonates in my room, followed by horrendous BOOM of a stinking bomb. Megan, however remains silent.

"Really!" I get up and push her off the bed, "Are you perfectly sure the flowers are blooming or you just ate something really bad for your breakfast?"

"Like, Milo's dick?" Megan suggests sporting a wide grin, her head full of fantasies.

"Like...what?" I deadpan. Now I have known Megan since the time we were diaper buddies and sucked each other's thumbs (in an innocent manner). The idea of your best friend giving a blow job to a random guy isn't...well...the thing you want to hear in mornings.

"You know Milo's dick?" She carries on innocently, "It was big and kind of disgusting at first...not to mention the hair on-"

"SHUT THE FUCK UP!" I shout and slap my palms on my ears,  drowning her description of Milo's dick.

Almost simultaneously, my door opens and a guy's head pops in. "You ladies finished cat fighting?" 

Logan, my other best friend is in short- dumb, unattractive, innocent and insanely obtuse. Now reverse all that. He is smart, sexy (as fuck...not my words), needs a dip in holy water and a womaniser. His hair is sticking in all the directions, complimenting his intensely green eyes.

"There is only one lady in this room," Megan points out, crossing her arms on her chest. Her blonde hair fall all over shoulders to her back, as she gets up.

"Me?" I ask.

"You kidding?" she retorts pointedly, "Of course, it's me,"

"Prove it!" I answer my eyes challenging. 

"Fine!" she replies calmly and gets up on the bed. She starts by taking her jacket off , then she plays with the hem of her shirt. Glinting maliciously at both of us, she starts raising her shirt. 

It takes me a moment to realise what she is doing. I grab her and pull her down. Fixing her shirt, I hiss, "FINE. Now stop annoying me and leave!"

"Ah!" Logan interrupts and plops himself on the bed, "Now how would we ever survive without annoying you?"

I throw him a dark look and repeat again, "Guys. At least let me shower!"

"By all means-" Logan starts.

"We didn't stop you," Megan interrupts and takes out her phone. She then reclines comfortably on  my bed, her skirt raising a few inches. Now Megan is my best friend but one of the things I despise about her? Her clothes. 

I sigh and get up. Well try to get up, honestly. What! You can't expect a person to walk normally the instant he or she is up! Especially not someone as clumsy as me.

Ignoring the other two baboons in my room, I proceed to take out a pair of shorts, T-shirt, underwear and a bra from my drawers. 

"I prefer the black one," Logan says out of the blue.

Furrowing my eyebrows, I ask confused, "What?"

He turns to me and enunciates every word, "The black one, it suits you,"

"I heard you the first time,"I tell him, rolling my eyes, "Black what?"

"Black bra," he turns back to his phone.

I swallow a couple of curses and make way to my bath room. This is what I call Logan's usual behaviour. 

Turning the shower on, I let my mind drift to the past few months. It hasn't been easy, I admit. Seven months, seven months. I had locked myself in my room, waking up, showering, eating, attending my online lessons, cutting myself and in the night...succumbing to the nightmares. Waking in the middle of the night with beads of sweat dripping, clutched hands and screaming. It had become my routine. 

But the last three months. They had been different. I had let my dear best friends- Megan and Logan to come back again. To me. They helped me cope, ease the pain, they cried with me, laughed with me. They are more than my friends, they are family. 

Even if they act completely insane sometimes. But isn't that what best friends are for?

The droplets of water fall on the my arms. They alleviate the pain in my stinging wrists. Three cuts are engraved there, fading. Purple blotches have started appearing on the edges. Good, that means they are healing.

Yet again, they are permanent. 

They are my weakness.

***

"I don't want to go to school," I blurt. We are watching TV, I don't know what made me blurt that out. But, it had been swirling in my head for some time. 

My online courses ended today. Tomorrow, I will go to back to my old school. Means? Facing the old memories, walking through that dreadful corridors again, meeting all my idiots...after one year. 

But something tells me that I am not ready. I never will be.

Logan glances at me worriedly. Megan switches off the TV and sighs. She hugs me from the side and asks, "Why?"

I wrap an arm around her and reply stuttering, "I don't want...to...face...it all...again, I...can't,"

Logan comes to my side. He traps me in a side hug and nuzzles his head in my shoulder and muffles, "You are strong, Vanessa. It will be so difficult, I know it will..." he gulps, "But you can't stay in your house, alone...everyday. You cannot bow! You need to remain strong, it will be the only way out," 

"And little poppet," Megan continues, "We are right here with you and we will be, till the time you will not stop fighting...we will be there. You ain't getting rid of us that easily,"

A small smile breaks out on my face. I quietly caress Megan's hair. I wish I could stay here, like this, beside them, forever. Not caring about anything.

But even I know that isn't possible. What a pity.

The last thing, I remember before my eye lids getting heavy was Logan whispering, "Fight Van,"

But Logan, didn't you realise? My eyes drift to my fully covered arm, beneath my inner demons lie. The cuts calling to me, reviving the most sinful memories in my mind.

Didn't you realise Logan?

I stopped fighting, a long time ago.

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THANK YOU FOR READING. I KNOW THIS CHAPTER MAY SEEM A LITTLE HAZY AND BORING BUT...STICK WITH ME?