The Irish Tattooist

Chapter 25

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Love ya'll.

Good answers were relative to a person. In tests, good answers always had evidence, examples and justifications on why that answer was given, or that conclusion was made. Hammer did not give a good answer. 

I sat in front of him, both of us alone in the bar since the others had left, and stared. Stared until the big man met my gaze, and being able to hold it for more than two seconds. 

"I'm angry." Exhibit A for not  good answer. 

Oh, no shit sherlock. A blind man would be able to tell he was angry- but at what depth did this anger turn into something that made him bring Leftover Lacey back? Bring that much pain back to my Seamus and those bad memories for my Ripper?

"About what?" Was my civil reply, even though my fingers itched to claw at his face. There had to be a good answer- some reason that would make me not pray for forgiveness at the end of tomorrow. 

Hammer stayed silent, jaw clenching. "I'm angry at Ripper, for having such a good life." 

"What do you mean?" 

Hammer's head snapped up, hands splaying out in front of him. "He has you, first of all. A woman far out of his league- but somehow loves him, a club that looks up to him, and a president that thinks of him as his own son. You've heard about what we did together- we're not meant to have good lives. We're meant to be punished" 

I took it all in, sitting quietly for a few moments, processing what he said. 

"So you're saying" I took a breath. "That you're jealous of everything he has and want to ruin it out of your own spite" 

Hammer opened his mouth to argue, but clamped it shut again, obviously seeing how right I was. I shook my head, sighing. I would reserve the brunt of my own anger for Lacey, but let a trail of it taint my words. Hammer was lost- so, so lost in his own spite that he failed to see what he had. 

"Ripper still punishes himself Hammer. It's only with me, through constant upliftment, that he is learning to forgive himself." I placed a hand on his, squeezing it gently when he didn't look up. "You need to forgive yourself too. You have so much substance and so much to be grateful for in your life that you can't continue to hate yourself and narrow your existence to what you have done" I held his hand in mine, imploring him with my gaze. 

"But if that journey is hard- don't bring us with it. Lacey is Seamus' mother Hammer. And she left him like he didn't matter. Today, she came back and didn't even glance at her son" 

Hammer's shocked gaze came to me, flicking to the door and face darkening. "I didn't know. I wouldn't have-" He dropped his head, exhaling slowly. 

He grabbed my hands and gripped them tightly, biting his lip. "Thank you Corin. Thank you" 

And then he went into the back room, doing what any real man would. 

Apologize.

I smiled gently, then stood. That was one person down. There was one person left- especially if she didn't leave. 

All the men came out of the back room, a tension still between them but it was muted now, calmer. 

I immediately went to Seamus, pulling him aside from the group and placing my hands on his shoulders. 

"Are you okay?" 

Seamus was still stiff, face tight with unshed anger. "No. No, I'm not." He lifted his head, looking me straight in the eye. "I don't care what you do to her. She didn't even look at me Cor." 

I gathered him in my arms and held him, catching Ripper's amber gaze. We shared the same thought. 

If she didn't leave soon, it would be up to me. 

_______

Seamus went back home after, wanting some time to himself and get some things off his chest. That boy had been through so much in so little time. 

The youth of these days- while they may have more privilege and luxuries- lack so much too. They lack familial time, love and connections that are built based on understanding a person- rather than understanding the selfies and then the person. 

While evolution is amazing, it's also a double edged sword. Divorce rates are higher, percentages of families without two parents are increasing....there was so much this world could and couldn't do. 

It was about finding a balance. Sadly, Seamus had never had that- not even with his own father. From what I knew, his dad was constantly out on club business and was rarely home. 

It was hard for everyone these days- and in some respects, even more so for youth. Especially my Seamus. 

And he was mine, because we were family .He was like my son, my brother...I sighed out loud, falling back into Ripper's chest. His strong arms immediately came around me, one hand idly stroking my hair. 

"What are you thinking about love?" 

I let my head fall onto his shoulder, turning to look at his roguish face. "Seamus. Lacey. What I'm going to do." 

Ripper tightened his grip, kissing me lightly on the cheek. "I'll be here with you, remember that. You don't have to do everything by yourself" 

I smiled, reaching up for a deeper kiss, one that left my mind muddled and hazy with heat. He turned me over, pulling me flush against his body in a hard move. I grinned lazily, curling into his chest. 

My strong, immovable Ripper. "I love you Cearul" I whispered, closing my eyes against the beat of his heart. 

"I love you more Corin." 

Sometimes- sometimes- love was enough. 

Somebody just had to try harder, do more, love fully in order for it to be enough. 

_____

I have no idea about the shit I'm writing since I'm living on a diet of maltesers and tea right now. 

BTW MY BALL IS COMING UP AND MY DATE Is HOT  AF

Are ya'll happy for me. I am. 

Thanks for reading familia, love yah. 

xoxoxoxoxoxo