ALL WE SEEM TO DO IS TALK ABOUT SEX

2 - lauren

you take your shoes off in the back of my van.

these meetings always start the same - we walk in, and ally is playing folk music. now i'm very appreciative of any type of music (except country), so i don't really mind what type of music she plays before the meetings. some other people do, though, often complaining that they don't like folk, that she should play other kinds of music - mainstream music mostly. i can't help but smile at the eye roll that they gain from ally.

ally and i, over the time that i've known her, have managed to find an understanding - she plays the music she wants, i don't mind, and later we complain about the troubled youth and their turn to ridiculously bad music.

it's not 6:30 yet, when the meetings usually start, so we all walk around, speaking to the people that we know, eating the food that was put out to eat as we leave. we eat it anyway.

it's pretty much a routine now; ally always scolds us, stating that she puts the food out as "closers", but we still do it. as she is already aware of our contradicting nature, she should be smart enough to state that we should eat the food when we walk in. we wouldn't touch them until the end.

teenagers, am i right? they're a pain in the ass.

now, i'm not friends with very many people in this support group, mostly because they are all so much younger than me. but dinah is pretty cool. (she's still younger, but she's one of those younger people that are tolerable.) so we talk. we bounce right off each other, because we have the exact same sense of humour, so whatever i say, she banters back. i made her a promise that one day i'll get her in my bed; she completely disagrees with that theory, but i believe i'm getting closer to it.

every time that i speak to dinah, it has to be me approaching her - because she thinks she is too fabulous to speak to anyone. i do agree with that, she is one of the sexiest girls i've ever seen in my entire life. and i've had my fair share of girls. but dinah doesn't think she is fabulous because of her body - she thinks she is fabulous over all. which is, admittedly, quite unarguable. she's pretty great. she's almost girlfriend material.

but not quite.

i've known dinah for long enough to not consider her girlfriend material - i don't ever imagine myself pacing down a park with her, holding hands, laughing, having deep philosophical conversations. no, i imagine my face buried deep inside her neck, my hands all over her body, her squirming underneath me.

i know exactly what girlfriend material is. and that's why today is slightly different to every single other meeting.

i mean, for one, i can see dinah approaching me, which is pretty unusual. our interactions usually go something like this:

me: hey, babe.

dinah: not your babe.

me: no hello?

dinah: you're not funny.

me: hansen, show me some loving.

dinah: i know you get enough loving without needing mine.

me: oh, but yours is special, princess.

dinah: you are absolutely disgusting. why don't you hit on other girls your age - you go to high school for fuck's sake. you're a junior in a band - you get enough pussy.