Cheerleaders

48.5kg

4 WEEKS AGO

Camila
"Mila, what do you want?" Dinah asks me as the five of us sit around a small table at the ice-cream parlour which we usually go to for breakfast before cheer practice.

"I'm not hungry," I lie, biting my lip anxiously at the sight of the high calorie sundaes on the menu.

"Camz, you didn't eat dinner last night either, are you feeling okay?" Lauren asks softly. I shrug and rest my head flat on the table.
"I'm not kidding, you have to eat something or you'll fall sick," Lauren continues to pester me.
"I'll eat at lunch today, I just don't want to be sick at practice," I try, bouncing my leg anxiously.
"Okay," she finally concedes, much to my relief.
"I don't feel like going for practice," Dinah whines after having ordered her ice cream.
"Do you guys know how unhealthy ice cream for breakfast is?" I ask, picking at my finger nails.
"Since when do you care about healthy?" Mani asks, raising an eyebrow at me. I inhale sharply, frustrated with my stupidity.
"Since we started getting weighed at practice," Lauren answers for me, crossing her arms and leaning back to fix one of her judgemental, yet concerned stares on me.
"Come on, Mila, you can't seriously be thinking about that," Ally says, leaning forwards.
"You guys look too deep into things," I say accusingly, pulling my legs up to my chest just as the waitress comes over with the other girls' orders.
"Eat some," Lauren offers, pushing her ice cream towards me.
"Lauren, I don't want to," I mumble.
"Okay babe," she says quietly. Thankfully they all drop the topic.
"We're going to be late for practice," I remind the other girls after five minutes.
"Okay, calm down Chanch," Dinah teases as we stand up from the table.
"Today is just strength and flexibility anyways, we won't do any actual cheerleading," Mani complains with a groan.
"Hey, I think we need the strength and flexibility classes, we have a competition this weekend, remember?" Ally chirps up. She takes her responsibilities as head of the team really seriously sometimes.
"Yeah, but we're all pretty fit already," Lauren counters as we enter the school campus and start to make our way to the gymnasium.
"Not really," I mumble.
"Hmm?" Mani asks, having heard me mumbling.
"Nothing, I'll race you there," I offer, eager to burn the calories.
"You're on," Lauren exclaims before sprinting ahead of me. I quickly catch up to her and then overtake her, reaching the door at lest fifty metres before any of the others.
"Damn Mila, have you been practicing or something?" Dinah asks, panting heavily as she reaches me.
"Kinda," I mumble, thinking back to all of my early morning runs. Once the other girls catch up, just as out of breath as Dinah, we walk into the gym. The familiar smell of rubber and the cool air conditioned air hit me. Strength and flexibility should burn calories, right?

***
"Good practice everyone," David says before ushering us into a line to weigh us again before we leave seeing as it's been two weeks.
"I still don't think this is a good idea," Lauren complains. I feel my heartbeat speeding up as the line shortens. What if I haven't lost any weight after two weeks of pushing myself to the limit.

"Camz?" Lauren asks, nudging me. I snap out of my daze to see that it's my turn. I walk over quickly to not frustrate anyone but pause for a brief second before stepping onto the weighing scale.
"48 and a half, that's pretty perfect, Camila. Good job," he tells me happily. I smile for a split second before frowning as I wait for Lauren. I could lose so much more. I will lose more.
"Stop zoning out," Lauren jokes and she grabs my hand and drags me behind her to the changing room.

"Why aren't we waiting for the others?" I ask, trying to pull her to a stop although it's in spite seeing as she's so much stronger than me. She finally releases her grip on me once we're in the changing rooms which are still empty.
"What are you doing?" I demand, rubbing my wrist.
"5 and a half kilos in 2 weeks?" she asks. I twist and bend my fingers anxiously, disturbed at the confrontation.
"So?" I mumble, racking my brain for a way to avoid this conversation.
"That's a lot, Camz, I just wanted to check if you're okay," she says softly.

"I'm absolutely fine" I mumble in an agitated manner.

"Camz, what's going on?" she asks with a sigh, pushing a strand of hair out of her face.

"Nothing," I lie, pursing my lips together. She stares at me for a second before shaking her head.

"You're lying to me," she states. "I don't want you to lose anymore weight, okay?" she asks.

"Of course I won't, Laur, I'm happy with my current weight," I continue to lie effortlessly. She nods and pulls me into a hug but I tense up and move away slightly, not wanting her to feel the bulges of fat all over my body. She raises an eyebrow questioningly but thankfully a bunch of other girls walk in, giving me a reason to end the conversation.
********