Some fear death, whilst others fear pain... But not everyone is the same, some fear what others might say is worse then death itself but is like dying from the inside out, making you want to die quicker then you had originally planned. This fear this very great frightening fear the one that takes over your whole body for what feel like hours, when in reality we're only minutes or even seconds.. this fear that is so powerful, the one I'm so deeply afraid of... is the fear of loosing everything. Not just simply when you lose your keys or your phone or photos that you taken no losing something much more that just that, losing everything! Everything you've ever loved or cared for everything you've ever cherished so much it had become a piece of who you are something so great it could never be replaced. This just drains away slowly fading out of your life, more and more taking the memories with it dying ever so slowly... only to be left with a black void that you can never replace no matter how hard you try it will always be there. That, that right there is something I fear most. The fear only growing with each and every day that passes the fear grows stronger. I get attached I don't wanna let go the harder things will get. This very thought is the thought that scares me most, yet it's happened before... That could simply well be the reason as to why I have this great fear that keeps on growing, but yet you could say that I'm somewhat 'prepared' WELL IM NOT. THERE IS NOTHING THAT CAN PREPARE YOU FOR THIS MOMENT. this thought takes over your mind your soul and your body, not letting you take control it gets out of hand and the fear only grows bigger. It hurts. It's scares you more then you can imagine. It's a feeling you can't just simply ignore and brush off like a patch of dirt on your jeans, no this feeling is violent like getting stabbed with a knife but without the bleeding.. and there's not much you can do to stop the pain.
In times like these death doesn't seem so bad in fact it sounds better then this shitty uncontrollable feeling you get in the pit of your stomach the feeling that your head and mind just can't wrap around an indescribable feeling of pain, death.. doesn't seem so scary anymore... seems well kinda peaceful.
But I can assure you that much like this fucked up fear, I have a fear of death as well. People make death sound somewhat peaceful not at all scary. That death well is better then life in death they claim you have freedom.. I don't believe that's true. Another thing that scares me, is that before you die you have supposedly have 30 seconds or less of brain activity and during those seconds which some say feel like hours or simply less then minutes your brain goes through your most desirable moments, what it believes to be your most treasured memories. you take one last gasp for air and you know in these exact moments that'll be your last breath your last taste of life, the last you'll see of those treasured memories and you're supposed to feel "free". Some how I don't believe that's "free". To me that's scary... knowing you're going to die in a few seconds and you can't do anything to prevent it or make it go faster scares me most.
It takes over...
YOU ARE READING
The un told story of fears
Short StoryThe fears in which some people don't know quite how to describe, the ones which make you question what you were told to believe... put in a way only some can understand, we talk about the fears no one else chooses to.
