Only Slightly Depressed

One

Jamie POV:

I woke up to screaming and immediately recognized the voice as that of my youngest sister, Rose.

"BUT I DON'T WANNA!" I heard Rose screaming and I knew she meant she didn't want to go to school. I groaned because I didn't want to either. I wasn't sure why, I mean not having friends never stopped me before. I just didn't feel like I could survive another day at school. I started to think, wondering why I didn't want to go to school.

Is it because we can't listen to music? No, that's never stopped me before. Well maybe it's because people are gonna want to see your eyes. Again, never stopped me before. Isn't there something that has stopped you before? Nope ... unless you include sickness. Well then what's stopping you today? I don't know, that's what I'm trying to figure out. Well you have to go to school today, you've already missed eight days of school this year. I know, I know, part of me wants to go to school, but the other part doesn't. I wonder why that is. There you go again, always with the sarcasm. Sarcasm? What sarcasm? That's exactly what I mean.

Frustrated, I gave up on figuring out why I couldn't go to school and walked over to my dresser. I pulled out a random pair of black skinny jeans, a random black shirt and grabstitchesed and black hoodie. Then I walked to the bathroom and pulled on my clothes before walking back out to pull on my black converse and a black pair of socks.

Once I was fully dressed, I walked back into the bathroom to check and make sure my bangs were covering my eyes. I hear you all wondering why I want my eyes covered, well it's because I have two different colored eyes and I was always bullied for it when I was younger. So now I always cover my eyes with my black and red hair before going anywhere. I'm not even sure my family remembers what colors my eyes are or why I cover them.

Right as I reached for my backpack, I realized why I didn't want to go to school: I was a boy today and my male personality just hates school in general.

Once I figured out which gender I was and had my backpack, I walked outside. Unfortunately one of my homophobic brothers, Aaron, stopped me just outside the door. "Where do you think you're going?" He sneered. I groaned when I realized which brother it was. Aaron is the most abusive of all my siblings.

In fact just the other night he managed to hit my foot with a lamp and two bruises formed in just a minute or so. Then he bites really hard and once I had to get stitched cause he threw a wrench at my head. So basically this was the sibling I least wanted to run into. Aaron's done more than that too, those were just a few examples to give you an idea.

"So, fag, are you my so called brother today or sister?"

I looked him right in the eyes, "What does it matter to you?"

"Well I thought you'd want me to use the right pronouns."

I rolled my eyes, though he couldn't see that, "I'm a boy today." Then I pushed past my brother and outside.

I walked to the bus stop and waited, while a few of my siblings were there, they just ignored me and I ignored them. When the bus got there, I walked on and sat in the back row and leaned back in the seat so I was out of the view of most people.

The ride started out okay, until girl with long, straight black hair pulled into a ponytail and a very glittery and red outfit on sat down next to me. I knew she was a new kid immediately because no one else on the bus would dare to sit there rows away from a seat I touched.

"Hi I'm Jackie." The girl turned to me and offered me her hand to shake. "And you are?"

"Jamie." I mumbled, almost inaudibly and slightly annoyed with this girl and her sparkly outfit.

"What a nice name!" Then she looked closer st me, clearly inspecting my every feature.

After a while she spoke again and asked the question only bullies dared to ask me, "If I may ask, what gender are you?"

I glared at her, knowing she couldn't see my gaze fixed right on her. I was seriously getting ticked off with this girl. First she sits next to me, making me automatically uncomfortable, then she starts asking me personal questions–well not exactly personal, more like annoying and slightly rude questions, but of course she had no way of knowing that. Looking back on it now I feel like I was too harsh to her, like she was only trying to be nice and make sure no one felt left out.

My response to her question wa, "Why the FUCK do you even care? Why?" I whisper-yelled so I didn't get in trouble with the bus driver. I could visibly see that I had hurt the girl–Jackie–and caught her off guard too, but I kept going. "You don't even know me, so why? Why do want to know so much about me? Why do care about this useless information about me?"

The poor girl just sat there, staring at me in shock. A few other heads has turned, but they all turned back once they saw who was shouting.

Not another word was said between me and the new girl for the rest of the ride and as soon as we were off the bus we went our own separate ways. Unfortunately mine just happened to be right into the arms of one of the bullies I face each day, Chad.

I looked up and wanted to curl up in a ball and cry from the intensity of the anger I saw flashing, not only in his eyes, but all across his face. I could've blinked as much as I wanted and he wouldn't have noticed, but I didn't and eventually he said, "Well I better be going off to class, see ya." He feinted walking away and turned back around, he shoved me yo the concrete sidewalk, hard. Then my vision went dark.

A/N Sorry for the cliffhanger on the first chapter, I know I'm so evil, but expect more evilness throughout this book. 

Also the picture at the top is Jamie.

That's it for now, love for everyone.

~Nikki 😘😘