Idk?¿

Only person that I know knows that this account is me so idrc. I honestly feel so shit like to the point where I can't fucking get up out of bed in the morning I feel so shitty and crappy that I can't physically get myself up and do normal people things. I'm so tired and honestly I feel so fucking isolated and I feel like there's nothing to live for. I hate waking up, knowing I exist it physically and mentally hurts me. I'm writing on this cus I thought maybe writing this shit down will at least help me try to understand it or some shit. but idk. I used to feel like I had reasons to live but i don't anymore, I've pushed my friends from my old school away, And the people att the school I go now basically all hate me,, my 'friends' are a bunch of fucking snakes and my family hate me so fucking much, I have no one, nothing and tbh I don't blame any of these people cus I hate myself too I fuck everything up everything I touch I ruin it I mess it up. I don't know what's wrong with me I don't know why I always fuck everything up no one else ever does it's always me like I just can't comprehend anything rn. I honestly dek what I'm writing and I'm so confused and god I wanna shoot my bloody brains out