Killer Instinct

Chapter X

X.

Putting my emotions aside was proving very difficult, I decided as I spooned lime flavored Jell-O into my mouth. Despite the fact that the memories of Misha and I had been absolutely fake, and I was now aware of that fake didn't mean I completely forgot those memories.

It was a strange sensation, knowing something had been a lie, but having emotions and memories that begged to differ.

Either way, I was stuck in this endless cycle of thinking I was in love with a man who simply thought of me as a child. Although I was eighteen, on the verge of nineteen he had no right to think that of me. It was impossible for me to be a child, seeing as I'd never truly had a childhood. I'd spent all of my time learning how to control and wield my exceptional powers responsibly and with precision.

I'd had it drilled into my head that my inability to control my powers could result in the accidental injury or death. When it had been discovered that my powers had been greater than anyone had ever imagined, I'd worn my silver bracelet which Doug Spielman used to control my powers. Little did I know, according to James Henry I'd had silver implanted all over my body to tamper down my power considerably.

He'd called me a universal, someone who can do anything with their mind, or eventually their brain will figure out a way on its own. While I'd always believed myself to be powerful, I'd never realized that there was very little I couldn't do, and when I really thought about it, I eventually could do it, which validated James' theory.

It also made him difficult to trust, because clearly he and Doug agreed that no such power should exist on Earth. Which meant that I had to have my own agenda coming into this mission. I was playing double agent, but my ultimate goal was to get my life back. To be a normal girl. To get away from all of this.

Did I love going on missions? Yes. Was I good at being a spy/assassin/agent for the MIA? Yes, yes I was. I was formidable in my own right thanks to a lifetime of training. But realizing that I'd been lied to my entire life didn't bode well with me.

I'd get my revenge against my father and aid in the destruction of the MIA. However after I was finished, I was done. I'd live off grid somewhere away from the calamity. I wanted to go to college, be a civilian. Live what could be considered a normal life, instead of living based off the terms someone else set for me years ago.

I hadn't had a choice in becoming what I was today. I'd be damned if I continued to live like this now that I knew what kind of monster my "father" was. I'd get revenge for myself, for my father, for Selene and her family and for my mother whom I'd never met.

Once that was over no one would ever claim me or control me again, and I'd kill anyone who got in between me and my freedom.

I slowly relaxed at the thought of starting over somewhere, of experiencing what it meant to be a civilian. Maybe then I'd get to see the world, not just when I was scouting location in all the different exotic locales to kill someone or infiltrate something. I could actually tour monuments and historical places, try different foods, meet different people, use all of my cultural knowledge of different languages for good instead of a means to survive.

And I could find my mother. The mother I'd never known, that had been stolen from me. The mother I'd never known, but desperately desired to find all my life. My throat constricted at the thought, but I quickly averted my thoughts. I needed to focus. Doug would be here any moment.

I sighed, sitting back against my pillows, and spooned another bite of the mandatory Jell-O. Which tasted like lime flavored slug guts. As I struggled to finish my meal, the door did open, and in walked Doug Spielman, the man I'd considered my father my entire life. Until now.