Canoe Journey

Memories

Somehow Matthew had convinced me to go out on Lake Union in a metal canoe. It was the middle of August and as hot as Seattle gets. The UW boat center rents out canoes and rowboats for a reasonable rate. Even since I almost drowned as a child, I'd stayed away from the lakes. Swimming in a pool didn't bother me, but as soon as I got above my chin in a lake, the cold fear pressed me down. Matthew thought that now that I'd gotten rid of the spirit that attacked me, I should face my fear. There seemed to be some disadvantage to dating a psychic.

"You know there's nothing to fear?" he asked as he helped me off the dock into the boat.

I stood with my feet planted on the dock. The dark water of the lake lapped against the wood. In my head, I knew that the lake was safe. I wore a orange life jacket and I was a good swimmer. In my heart, the fear still beat. It was easy to tell myself that it was safe, but the memory of that day in July when I'd almost died was strong.

It was the first time I'd been on the lake with my dad. He'd agreed to take me fishing with his friends. My parents had gotten divorced about three months previously and my dad wasn't great at making time for me. That and the fact that he had drunk a ton of beer with his buddies is what led to me falling off the boat into the water. I was wearing a life jacket, but that didn't seem to help. Something grabbed my ankles and pulled me into the darkness. I heard shouts from above, but it felt like there was nothing but the cold wet lightless water. A voice in my head told me that I would be staying, there would be no rescue from above.

I was ready to give up when something grabbed me. I couldn't tell whether it was up or down, but it pulled and then thing on my leg was forced to let go. The last thing I saw before I went unconscious was my dad's face looking down at me with the sun behind him.

I woke up in the hospital a day or so later. My mother was there and she was still furious. I heard here telling my aunt that my father wouldn't be seeing me again until I was over eighteen. That made me want to cry, but I was distracted by a little boy holding a blue teddy bear. He stood in a corner of the room and none of the adults payed any attention to him.

"Who are you?" I asked in a raspy voice.

"I'm Billy. I wanted to let you know you're going to be ok."

My mother heard me and said, "Genevieve, honey it's Mom. Just rest."

"I wasn't talking to you," I said. "Billy says I'm going to be ok."

He was my first ghost. It took a while for Mom to believe I could talk to the dead. I've been dealing with spirits ever since.

I stepped into the boat. "I hope you're a patient teacher."

Matthew smiled. With you, always."