❝I tell myself I'm getting better, but now I'm realizing I'm not better. And I don't think I can handle this by myself anymore.❞
[thirteen reasons why season one]
[jeff atkins/maria vergara]
Oops! This image does not follow our content guidelines. To continue publishing, please remove it or upload a different image.
┌ 00 ; GIVE ME A REASON ┘
═══════════════
❝Hey, it's Hannah. Hannah Baker. Don't adjust your ... whatever device you're hearing this on. It's me, live and in stereo. No return engagements, no encore, and this time, absolutely no requests. Get a snack. Settle in. Because I'm about to tell you the story of my life. More specifically, why my life ended. And if you're listening to this tape, you're one of the reasons why.❞
═══════════════
Maria Vergara never thought her life would fall apart. For seventeen years, her life had been smooth sailing. Easy-going childhood with both parents still in love after twenty years of marriage, popular with her peers and easily achieving a 3.7 GPA. She walked through the halls of Liberty High like she was a goddess. She had almost zero enemies, save for Bryce Walker, who she resented the existence of. That was normal, since many girls did.
She landed the sweetest, hottest guy in her grade within the first month of freshman year. He treated her like royalty and she returned the favor. For a whole two years, they were the happiest couple anyone had ever seen, stuck in their honeymoon phase the whole time. Her parents would coo at them when they had study dates and movie nights. Maria was so happy with her life.
═══════════════
❝I'm not saying which tape brings you into the story. But fear not, if you received this lovely little box, your name will pop up. I promise.❞
═══════════════
But the summer before junior year was where everything crumbled. In just one night, Maria's whole world collapsed. Jeff, her soulmate, the love of her life, dead from a car crash late at night. Her body rejected the news, throwing her into the five stages of grief instantaneously. Denial lasted until she saw his body which was only a few hours after the crash. Anger and bargaining lasted longer. But she hasn't reached the final stage, being stuck at depression for three months. She can't pull herself out of it, constantly being reminded of the loss she faces each day.
═══════════════
❝Anyway, the rules here are pretty simple. There are only two. Rule number one: you listen. Number two: you pass it on. Hopefully, neither one will be easy. It's not supposed to be easy, or I would have emailed you an MP3. When you're done listening to all 13 sides, because there are 13 sides to every story, rewind the tapes, put them back in the box, and pass them on to the next person. Oh, and the box of tapes should have included a map. I'll be mentioning several spots around our beloved city. I can't force you to visit them, but if you'd like a little more insight, head for the stars. Or, you know, just throw the map away and I'll never know, or will I? You see, in case you're tempted to break the rules, understand I did make a copy of these tapes, and I left them with a trusted individual who, if this package doesn't make it through all of you, will release those copies in a very public manner.❞
═══════════════
Her friends tried every day to try and pull her out of the grief bubble she's enveloped in. Nothing worked. She would spend days locked away in her room, rewatching TV shows the couple binged on together or crying over happy photos the two took together. She hardly attended classes, only going when her parents would make her leave the house. Her place on the cheerleading squad was given to someone else, and she had quit the yearbook team when confronted by Tyler. Her GPA dropped from 3.7 to 2.1, meaning she would not even come close to starting senior year. She didn't care.
Maria was drowning. And it seemed like she wasn't going to reach the surface.
═══════════════
❝This was not a spur of the moment decision. Do not take me for granted. Not again.❞
═══════════════
Hannah Baker's death shocked the hell out of Maria. The two were close friends, almost inseparable before the accident. They confided in each other about everything and anything. It was what best friends did.
Hannah was the only one who could make Maria crack a smile when the girl attended classes. They would sit and hold hands in the classroom if Maria's memories flooded her mind again, Hannah doing everything to try and cheer her up.
Maria didn't even know she was struggling.
Now, she was going to find out what caused Hannah to kill herself, and what role she played in it all.
═══════════════
❝Maria Vergara. I'm sorry.❞
═══════════════
published:april 12th 2017
i kept telling myself i wouldn't write for 13rw because i knew i wouldn't do it justice but jeff atkins' beautiful face won me over. damn him.
13rw has become my new love. i read the book years ago and it is still to date the book that has had the most effect on me. and the tv show has given me that same feeling, even years after reading it. i love the book and the show equally and they're amazing.
onto my character!! established relationships are what fuel my fire so i had to make jeff/maria already a couple!! maria is one of the reasons why but not in the way you may think. i'm sorry if i don't write depression/grief well, i haven't experienced grief and my depression is quite mild so i'm not an expert in any of it. also, i'm not trying to romanticize any of it!!
