The Quixwood Diaries

Chapter 7 - The Guard of the Hell Gate

EMMA

September 3rd 2011

Dear Diary,

Something terrible happened today.  Something awful.

It was an accident, of course it was.

But I hit a woman with my car and she died.

She came out of nowhere.

I was on my way home from work when it happened.

I was so tired, I’d barely looked away for a second and then it happened.

I didn’t even see her.  I just felt the car shudder and saw the window break before she rolled right over the roof of my car.

The police believe me when I said it was an accident and it was!

But that doesn’t stop me from feeling …

I don’t know what I’m feeling or what I should be feeling.

I took a woman’s life.

She had a husband, parents, two sisters and a brother.

And I’m the one who took her away from them.

How am I supposed to live with myself after tonight?

How am I supposed to face them when they take this to court?

I can only pray that they too, like the policemen, know that it was an accident.

Sincerely, Zoe

_______________________________________________________________________

September 24th 2011

Dear Diary,

So the family aren’t pressing charges, thankfully.

Great.

I haven’t been feeling like myself much lately.

And I think I might be coming down with something.

I keep getting these hot and cold flushes but all at the same time.

It’s like a fever but lots worse.  Even as I write this, I feel too weak to do it.

My hands are shaking like crazy.  Every other part of me shakes too.

May be I’m dying.

May be that’s for the best.

Sincerely, Zoe

October 3rd 2011

Dear Diary,

I feel much better now.

Stronger.

The fever passed.

I think I was hallucinating a lot too.

Imagining the most horrible things.

I thought I had wings.

If you’d believe such madness.

But I’m better and I’m coping.

Sincerely, Zoe

October 10th 2011

Dear Diary,

I found something that belonged to my Dad.

A bunch of old diaries.  I didn’t even know he kept them.

But I didn’t like what I found out about myself or our family whilst reading them.

I know I shouldn’t have read them.  They were my Dad’s most secret thoughts and such.