Lessons || MJ

Lessons || Chapter 33

Author's Note: Sorry about the wait, everybody. It took a lot for me to write this chapter and update such a dark plot in general.  Also, I know that the bold verse doesn't fit in that 1980's era, but its lyrics mean so much for this point of the fan-fiction. Feedback is appreciated.

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CALVIN SMITH

Heaven if you sent us down.
So, we could build a playground.
For the sinners to play as saints.
You'd be so proud of what we've made.
I hope you got some beds around.
Cause you're the only refuge now.
For every mother, every child, every brother.
That's caught in the crossfire...

("Crossfire" by Stephen, 2016)

"Put the gun down. I can explain everything, mama. Just please..." I cautioned with a trembling voice for once. Yvonne remained completely still as she watched Leslie point the firearm right in front of me again. My hands lifted to the ceiling, complying with the demands of a woman I loved. The fear and reasonable anger found within her eyes crushed my soul.

"No!" Leslie barked with a shaking hand while tears clouded her ebony eyes. "You're dying today, Calvin! I can't take this bloodshed no more."

A gunshot rang through the house.

That bullet wandered instead and somehow pierced Yvonne right into her beating heart.

My jaw dropped at the view of her lifeless body bleeding on her own kitchen floor. After Leslie somehow called authorities without emotion, I found myself cuffed once again. The death that occur today was not my fault this time, but police still referred to the charges of trespassing and attempted murder now. Only a dumbass would mention my killing sprees as if details proved unheard of.

While cops hurled me away, paramedics hoisted Yvonne as soon as possible when Leslie finally broke down. Crouched before the gurney, speech wailed right into the palms of her ebony hands. For the first time in years, I hated myself for even buying a gun. Dodging triggers would've saved lives.

But not my own.

__

LESLIE

I turned away as her shining casket lowered further and further into the ground. Nelson rubbed my shoulder in circular motions. Jerome dropped his eyes in shame. Our strong had dwindled time and time again, but I couldn't believe this mistake. With these routinely bloodshot eyes, we all returned to the compound.

I wouldn't even Max or Darryl a second look when they passed me in the halls led to Nelson's private bedroom. Without fail, I curled against his now bare chest and sobbed uncontrollably. He hugged me right back as we lay on these soothing blankets. His heart ached just as much, but I just couldn't handle the pain any longer.

The next morning, I woke up alone. No gunshots. No shouting voices. As I shivered with the blanket against my chest, I'd turned onto my stomach and found a scribbled note on the empty pillow. After scooting over to reached for my glasses, I hurried sit up in this nearly iced bedroom and read.

Piglet,

After a few calls, we've contacted your Mom. It's best for you, Darryl and Max to leave while you've got a chance on running. If Yvonne died, only the Lord knows who's next. I can't risk losing any more of you in such an unexpected way. There's a huge difference between my sins as a person and what happened last night.

Please understand.

-Nelson

At breakfast, yelling rang through my numb ears. Both Darryl and Max protested vehemently by now. I could only pray after eating to keep my sanity. My hands pressed together as I knelt before one of the lower bunkbeds. Nelson thankfully explained that family wouldn't even step foot onto this hellhole. Our loved ones just knew about Yvonne passing away.

Drained, I still couldn't move and only prayed. As my words pointed for the skies of heaven, Footsteps marched into the room, my puffy eyes looked to see Jerome. He leaned against the doorframe without a word as everyone continued arguing down the hallway. I shook my head, overwhelmed and numbed at the same time. This odd combination would never vanish considering what happened days before.

"It's all my fault." I blamed myself for her death. My sister was gone because of my anger. If only she hadn't been standing in that kitchen with us. I should've asked her to leave. I should've slammed the door behind her and pressed the gun barrel right into the back of Calvin's head. No other witnesses. Just him and me.

"You wanted to kill Calvin and the bullet strayed. It was an accident." Jerome offered reason, but I wouldn't even think about listening to a brother I'd almost lost for real.

"No." I shook my head once more as tears began to fall. I'd finally shattered in the name of guilt. "I should've never met Calvin or you guys. This is what happens when people are stupid. Now, I just killed someone for no reason. She never deserved to die."

__

During one of our fleeing "road trips," I turned up the radio while Yvonne steered. Quiet Storm music eased our frazzled nerves time and time again at night. I'd somehow find peace around music, but never chose singing as a career. With the international degree under my belt, I'd planned to travel, but never like this.

A faint smile reached my lips when one familiar song began playing. Even Yvonne laughed to herself during this moment and sighed out loud. Sade blessed us with her lovely voice.

If I tell you.
If I tell you not?
Will you keep on?
Will you keep on loving me?
If I tell you.
If I tell you how I feel.
Will you keep bringing out the best in me...

Yvonne smiled widely and bits of grief vanished from her eyes. Her nails carefully tapped the steering wheel as this song continued.

"Sing with me." she winked for a moment before facing the front again. How could I refuse my "sister?" Smiles returned to our faces in that moment while the vehicle moved along roads.

You give me the sweetest taboo.
That's why I'm in love with you.
You give me the sweetest taboo.
Sometimes I think you're just too good for me...

I'd always treasure that time and value countless other memories.