Alive Again

Prologue

Mild spg ahead: lenggwahe, Kaharasan, sekswal.

Read at your own risk.

(Emilia Yanna at media)

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Should I be happy? Wouldn't I regret this? Should I swim up? Maybe this is good for me, me dying underwater.

What a beautiful scenery I see before my eyes, up above the calm waters- the white full moon and the twinkling stars looks down upon me.

I slowly raised my right arm, as if I'm reaching for them, but I know they are out of my grasps as I could feel my body slowly sinking down.

Suddenly I felt something hit my head and felt pain. I saw blood flowing out but it just dissolved and there's more... And more... And more of it.. And slowly fading away as it blends with this vast waters.

Slowly, I closed my eyes, as if I'm ready to embrace my cold and painless death and I couldn't help reminisce what happened to my life.

It started when I turned 18, and my parents announced my engagement with a son from a prominent business family of Alcantara named Gelo -Christian Angelo Alcantara. Well, all I can say he is the typical tall, mestizo, handsome and a jerk. Knowing what our -now unstable business, this lead my parents to push through this kind of decision and as a loving daughter, I won't let them down.

Months passed, our relationship is smooth sailing. Well, we rarely talk at school, as if we are not engaged. Actually I'm OK with this. We go out on dates when its necessary, to show our parents of how we really loved each other - well note the sarcasm there.

But then, a big fucking problem occured. There's a scandal, going viral, starring me and some guy that I do not know. Cutted video and some naked pictures of me and with that man circulated in social media, my school, and eventually reached my parents. Believe me. I swear. Nothing happened between me and that guy and I think it was just a set up to fucking smear my name.

This what really happened. Me and my friends went to a bar to celebrate the end of a school year, we passed all the subjects and me making on a dean's list. I was drunk and my friends are nowhere to be found. And there, some guy grabbed me on the dancefloor. We danced, I lost control of myself and I don't know what I'm doing anymore. He offered me some drink and moments later I felt dizzy all of a sudden. I know this kind of modus. I tried to get out of the situation but I couldn't. Later, I found myself, with him on my top, in some cheap hotel room. I tried to get him off me, but I am too weak because of the drug and he is too strong. I shouted 'help' and I wonder if I really voiced out those words. He started to undress me, molest me, hands caressing all over my body and moaned. I said 'stop, please', but he couldn't hear me.I don't want to lose my 'v' in this way. So with every ounce of my strength, I pushed him away and kicked his fucking balls, and I'm not contented yet. I grabbed the telephone and banged it on his head. I dressed and walked away from that room.

It was a big scandal that made my engagement broken off. I should be happy, right? But I'm not. My parents scolded me, slapped me, and said I'm a big disappointment. I cried and tried to tell them the truth but their ears are closed.

I ran away from home at that night and went to my best friend -April. As I was about to knock, I noticed the door was half closed. So I secretly sneaked inside but it was a wrong move. I heard April's voice. She said that her plan is successful and she completely ruined my name and she thank the man on the video -who is with her right now. Tears ran down again onto my face. She betrayed me. The scandal was here idea and she hates me all this time.

I left that place dumbfounded. I don't know where to run anymore. And I thought of Gelo. I went to his place.

"What are you doing here?" He asked as he sat on his couch. He is drunk and noticed some bottles of alcohol scattered on his floor.