*****Two months later*****
I sit at my counter eating and listening to 5sos. My mom comes down stairs just as I started singing my favorite part of 'heartbreak girl' "And I'm stuck in the friendzone again and again"
"Aww poor babies" my mom says sarcastically looking in the fridge.
"Mom the struggle is real."
"Yeah I know it's real...at least I know it's your struggle haha!" My mom says, shes laughing and I can't help but laugh too.
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*Flashback*
I walk by my locker with my friends and see Logan
"Hi hazel"
"Hey Logan" I said smiling and we hugged. All of my friends seemed pretty surprised, Sarah almost dropped her Starbucks.
"What's up with you two?" Asked Lucile with a smile. Logan and I looked at each other for a second
"Oh uh-" I began
"We're just friends" Logan said flatly.
*end of flashback*
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She's right. It is my struggle, but what could I do? How do you even get out of the zone? Yup. No idea. I honestly would like to be more than friends but I mean, how? Valentines day was coming up soon maybe ill send him one and tell him how i feel.
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Valentines day. The worst day ever. Today I planned to wear my anti love outfit but I think I'll take a shot at love. I wrote Logan a like um, note with my feelings on it. I'm going to ask Lucile to give it to his best guy friend to give it to him. I've been nervous all morning just repeating what I wrote in my head.
' hi Logan, um I like you and I know that saying that is just a shout into the void and oblivion is inevitable but I still like you.....'
Ok I know nice job Hazel using John Green's genius in your loser 'love life' which isn't much. Even though my name is Hazel, doesn't mean I'll get a cute lanky boyfriend so easily. I'm hopeless.
＊＊
I hadn't gotten any type of reply from Logan all day, not even in class. So I decided to text him.
To: Logan
Hi👋
***
From: Logan
Hey👋 Hazel I just wanna say that we've been friends for a really long time, since like 1st grade with all the slimy elementary kids 😂 I just think we should stay friends, thank you so much though!!
*
I couldn't stop the tears from welling up in my eyes. I dropped my phone and just laid on the floor and cried. I made sure not to cry too loud for I didn't want anyone to come in my room, I just wanted to be alone.
For most, rejection is a simple kind of thing that people rarely show emotion for. That's nice and all but for people like me when I like someone I put my heart into it, I know it's a bad idea but I dunno, I just can't stop myself.
I feel horrible because Lucile got her heart shattered too earlier today, I told her to be strong and that there'll be other crushes but, I guess I can't really take my own advice. Maybe advice is stronger when it's from someone else.
I get off the floor and grab my headphones and iPod. I chose the song 'scene two: Rodger rabbit' by sleeping with sirens and got into bed, even though it was only 6pm I didn't care, I just wanted to get away for a while. And as the song progresses I fall asleep.
