The Letter

This is my first time writing a story so here it is. Tell me if i should continue or if i should leave it as it is, it was meant to be a one-shot but who knows.

I have been married for 3 years now. I married one of my best friends and I did love her very much, she has been with me in my worst times and helped me when I had lost everything.

Her.

No not my wife, but my first love. I still remember everything about her: The way her black hair flew with the wind, he huge smile, her sense of humor, the way she laughed at the most random times and she tried so hard to hide her laugh.

The way she was scared of heights, so much that even climbing stairs would make her eyes bulge but I was there to tell her that she was fine. The way she would just hold my hand because she just liked knowing that I was there. Her love for movies and books and the way she would say the entire dialogue and act out the scenes. Others might find it annoying but not I, watching her was better than anything else.

Why did she leave me? Where did she go? What did I do wrong?

Everything was perfect, We dated all through high school and college then one day she just starting acting strange. She missed classes, forgot about dates planned, I didn't see her as much, she looked really stressed and I wanted to know why but she would just change the subject. When we were together she didn't hold my hands, and when I did she would pull away after a while. She didn't look me in the eyes and when I did she looked like she was in the verge of tears. I wanted nothing but to know what was wrong but she decided that leaving was the best option I guess.

I talked with Lena about all of this, she was my other friend, and also now my wife. She made me see that Jaqueline was hurting me when I didn't do anything to deserve it. She slowly made me get over her and then one day we kissed and Jaqueline disappeared from my thoughts.

But she's still in my mind.

I can't forget her because I still don't know what happened and no one has heard of her or know where she is. One day as I was looking for a paper for my job I found a crinkled up paper in one of my old folders that my wife had labeled as the throw away pile. We were going to move and had been cleaning out things all day. After running into a picture of me holding Jaqueline and her smile being as big as ever I had a flashback of all our moments. Looking at this paper and seeing it covered with a few flowers that were Jaqueline's favorite doodles. She always drew them in everything just because she loved seeing them.

I don't remember seeing this ever and knew that this was in fact Jaqueline because it had a hint of her perfume. I opened it up and my heart shattered like never before.

Mark , I'm sorry to say that I will be leaving soon. I know you're wondering why I'm writing this and not telling you in person but if I did I wouldn't be able to do it. I don't want to hurt you but I know that in the en I will and I'm sorry. I never meant for any of this to happen and I wish it didn't have to. You've noticed that I have not been feeling well lately and you were right, I should have listened to you earlier. I found out that I have a 5% chance of living if I go without treatment. I know you would have offered to pay for everything and be by my side but I can't let you do this. I know that spending the last moments together is what is normally done but you have your whole life ahead of you and I don't want you to miss classes or put off graduation for me. You have to take care of yourself too not just me. I know you and you know me, we're both stubborn and I didn't want to fight. Anyways I am getting the treatment and I'm being sent to a medical facility that deals with this, but it's far away from you. I'll be leaving tomorrow which is why I made today the best day ever. I wanted to leave happy. I know I'm being selfish because you're probably going to hate me after this but I wish you could step into my shoes and understand. You know how I feel about you and my heart is breaking as I write this and I can barely see what I'm writing because I can't stop crying. If I die I can assure you that I died happily , even though I'm young I feel as if I lived a full life, every moment I had with you was perfect and I was always happy. Don't get angry at me please, you know I don't like it when people are angry, especially you. I'm sorry for doing this but I can't say goodbye because it would kill me instantly. If I do return, however time it takes I know you would have probably moved on. I don't blame you, you're pretty handsome and your eyes have the power to steal any girl's heart instantly. You stole mine remember. You still have it and I don't want it back, I still love you so so so much, but I want you to be happy and move on with life. I love you.