The Ties That Bind

Chapter Nine: Maybe, Baby?

April 10, Von Karma Estate, 9:00 AM

"Hans!" Franziska called out as she headed down the spiral staircase of the mansion. "Where are you?"

The distinguished silver-haired family butler appeared at the foot of the bannister immediately and bowed to his mistress.

"Ja, gnädige frau?"

"Ich vertraue dir, zum legte eine perfekt banane runter mir die hosen heute abend." She commanded.

"Wie bitte, gnädige frau?" The man's normally decorous air was rattled as he gaped at her.

"Sind sie schwerhörig?" Franziska haughtily raised an eyebrow.

"Was ist der grund, warum willst du es?" Hans exclaimed. "Ich bin so verwirrt!"

"Yes I am certain that forty years of service would reassure me that you and your wife will ensure perfection for the Master's birthday tonight," she replied impatiently. "But I want the details of what's on the menu for final approval now, not later."

"Ich verstehe nicht dein Englisch mehr besser als dein schreckliche Deutsch!" Hans cried, and without warning, scurried off to the west wing, towards the kitchen. Moments later, a stout woman with salt and pepper hair pulled back severely into bun appeared before her.

"Hallo, Helga," Franziska said coolly, placing a hand on her hip. "I do believe it is time to purchase a hearing aid for your husband. He didn't seem to understand my simple query of what was on the meal menu tonight for Miles' birthday. I am uncertain if he is getting daft or deaf at his old age."

"You were asking Hans about this evening's dinner selection, Madam?" Helga asked in a thick Bavarian accent to her mistress, smoothing down the wrinkles of her starched white apron. Her brow furrowed in confusion. "How incredibly odd. He told me that he was uncertain if either you or he were going slightly mad because he was under the impression that you had said 'I trust you to put a perfect banana down my pants tonight'. He was absolutely flummoxed at the request because he asked you why you would want such a thing. Then you asked him if he was deaf, and began talking to him in English, which he doesn't speak at all..."

Franziska felt her face reddening as she realized in horror what she had requested of the poor elderly man who had been loyally servicing the Von Karma family since before she'd been born. Out of all the staff, Helga was the only servant who spoke English, and tried to utilize it as much as possible. This was an immense relief to Franziska, whose mother tongue was apparently rustier than she could have ever realized due to her mostly Anglophone lover, her international travel and time in America. It made her wonder what other commands she had unknowingly muddled with the staff all this time as she was no longer perfect at speaking her native German!

Not that she would ever admit that to the help...

"So then he got frustrated and said that he didn't understand your English any more than your terrible German," Helga confessed, blushing. "And he ran to fetch me in his stead. My sincerely apologies on behalf of my husband, for any grievances. He is getting on in his years, and surely meant no intentional disrespect, Madam."

"Well, seeing as he's been in faithful service for so long and may just be having an off day, I suppose it doesn't matter what Hans thought he heard. Although, of course, I would never make such a foolish, outlandish request," Franziska declared with a dismissive wave of her hand and clearing her throat. "Helga, I demand nothing short of perfection on this momentous occasion. I want only the best for the Master's birthday dinner tonight. What is on the proposed bill of fare?"