Here is the second chapter. If you noticed that my cover has changed it's because someone awesome *cough-Menha-cough* has made it for me.
I dedicate this chapter to Aydin b/c he's just awesome like that and one of my suppourters.
<3LG19
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"I- I can't," I stutter out one last time. I can feel the flames on my face, the heat stinging my cheeks and forehead. I take deep breaths in hope of not hyperventilating at the front of the classroom.
"Anything!, " I wanted to yell at my English teacher, "Just say anything. Say I failed, but don't make me stand up here any second longer..." My hand twitched. I looked at the seconds arm on the clock. Tik, pound, tok. Tik, pound, tok. The beating of my heart harmonized with the clock in the über silence in the room.
"Ms.Parks, smack smack" Ms.Bryan finally spoke. I knew where this was going. One thing about Ms.Bryan is that she is very (VERY) lenient about the grades she gives us. We need to deserve the grades we get. "You are one of the best students I have. You're great at writing, but I am afraid that your fear of presenting is holding you back. Smack, smack. Hand in your essay please." I go -no, I rush- to her, relieved to be away from the front of the class. Ms.Bryan extends a wrinkled hand and I give her my neatly written essay . She looks at my paper. "I don't want your grade to be affected,Ms.Parks. I'm giving you a chance to come up here again when you feel ready." Ms.Bryan may be intimidating at times,but I love her for having faith in me at times like these. "You need to figure out how to get over this phobia of yours. You may sit. Smack, smack."I let out a breath and dive back to my desk. I melt into the seat and am happy when Ms.Bryan calls up the next presenters.
Some presentations pass by in a monotone, but some others managed to distract me from my earlier embarrassment. When Josh went up his two words were "Class Clown". Everyone agreed.
As Josh talked about his stories and his adventures I remember David once again. Carpe diem. Seize the day. Seize.The.Day. I bet Josh is the type of person who has seized all of his days.
***
"What was that?" demands my best friend, Lesley.
"I-. Well, see-" I begin. I was about to tell Lesley that I had been horrified, that I had thought this time I could really do it, that I could really talk in front of a class, but she interrupts me.
"Nevermind. It's not important. What I need to know is if my presentation was good," Lesley says. She's waiting for an answer.
"Yeah," I reply numbly, "really good." It feels like a lie, though. I feel bad because instead of paying attention as Lesley presented, I had been thinking of David.
"Thanks Juli," Lesley says satisfied.
Juli. That's my nickname. My real name is Juliette. Lesley tagged me with the nickname "Juli" three days after we met. I like it- well, I used to like it. Lesley was different at the time she gave me the nickname. Back then, in my eighth grade and freshmen years, "Juli" sounded like something you Lesley said out of love. It meant friendship to me, like no one else but that one important person calls you that nickname. It used to feel like that nickname made Lesley and I equals. Those were the times before Lesley started wearing make-up and heels: before she started caring about boys. It was when we would have sleepovers on Friday nights, but now she's too busy partying, and I'm left to read alone in my room.
Now, in tenth grade, the name feels demining. Whenever Lesley says it, it's like she's talking to a pet. I'm her pet. I hate that. I hate how she's changed so much. I used to worry about losing Lesley. I was worried that we'd end up like those girls in the movies that are best friends one moment, but enemies the other. I never wanted to lose her, but now I'm not so sure. But I know that no matter how unbearable Lesley can be at times, I love her more than anyone else- besides my family, of course. I love her like a sister. I swore to be her best friend forever, and I'm a person of my word.
