You're Insane Poetry/Prose

Commitment

I'm fucking terrified of commitment.
I'm scared I won't be able to do it.
I feel unworthy.
I'm told I'm beautiful.
I don't feel Beautiful.
Everybody loves you.
Cause the moment I like them, they turn to you.
Or tell me "Your friend ###### is really cute, could you hook me up with her!"
And I just silently nod and lead the way.
Hell you and my ex had a decent relationship (until he was a d#ck).

Is it wrong that I like him? WHY?! Liking people is normal. But then. Why does it feel wrong. I'm not good at communication. I'm not good at anything. I can't do it. I'm only a freshman. There will be more. There will always be more. And maybe it would be nice. Warm. And comforting.

But I can't. My head won't do it.

My problems are so minuscule. So small compared to people who are far worse than me.

Then why do I still feel the lump in my throat.

Is it wrong to want someone to commit to.

According to my head I guess so.