if i need to remember you- namjoon

prologue

Blank.

      Namjoon had never experienced that. The only feeling he'd had as close to this was boredom. Yet, that too didn't have as much of a lasting effect on him. Often, it would settle on his senses, and then vanish as fast as it'd arrived but this... this had been around far too long to be labelled as boredom.

This was empty.

       This emotion, no, sensation was so odd to the point where it was comfortable. And somehow, as he glanced over the men and women who had their heads bowed, he made eye contact with the polished portrait of his Girlfriend smiling, eyes crinkling and a knowing smirk plastered on, for the first time since she had jumped, that emptiness was filled.

        The same photo Namjoon had taken months ago. The couple had gone to a fair and she had just fought with an old woman over the last stick of candy floss, which had resulted in the senior citizen shouting profanities and poking her cane into her stomach. Eventually, she'd given up and walked away due to her continuous childlike screaming and exaggerated kungfu poses. She'd felt real victory as she strolled out of the store and handed the camera clad impatient Namjoon  the pink goodness. Right at that moment, he clicked the button on the camera, capturing Maya's winning smile.

Namjoon's lips stretched upward, curling into a grin at the thought as his gaze fell south, landing on his tie. The red silk stood out from the muted black ones the other men were wearing. The reason simply because this specific dark shade of red was Maya's favourite.

And as the funeral service droned on, with several people slowly blinking into sleep, Namjoon took his wallet out and skimmed the brown leather. He flipped it open, and scanned its contents, with his sight lingering on a picture of him and her. They had red solo cups in their hands and were laughing at a cheesy joke someone had told, mostly out of the fact that alcohol had taken over them.

The polaroid had initially belonged to Maya, but one night after Namjoon climbed through her bedroom window nearly in tears, She had given it to him as a reminder that she was always there for him.

Obviously, now Namjoon thought that it was ironic but nevertheless flipped it over to the back where she'd had written something he'd never forget even if he lost his memory for the next hundred years.

"keep it for me, have it with you when you need to remember me" -Maya

Namjoon followed the lead of her family members and threw a single rose onto her coffin, before the matte wood was lowered into the ground, never to be dug up again.
Softly, he whispered, "I will."

a/n:hey! so this is my first book and do let me know what you think of it, I'll try to update as much as possible and trust me when I say there'll be tons of twists(sorry lmao) thank you so much!
much love,
jimin