Short Stories and Essays

On Death

1.

Move on be brave
Don't weep at my grave
Because I am no longer here
Please don't let your memory of me disappear

My grandfather on my step mom's side​ just died as I'm writing this. I consider her my real mom but that's for  another essay. My mom was able to say goodbye I'm happy that she was able to. I knew him for a long and he was hard-nosed but he cared about us. It was as peaceful as you can get.

Then why am l feeling selfish about this? Is it the fear of it all? Fear Of my own demise?  Fear that it can end with no warning? It's all of it and of course the end being out of my  and everyone else's control. It's probably why people hate bad endings of stories.

2.

I may never find all the answers
I may never understand why
I may never prove
What I know to be true
But I know that I still have to try

So what's the answer then? My ego asks. There is none. That's the point isn't it?  Trying to type out rational thoughts about death out for this is both peaceful and scary at the same time. But that's the point. It's natural to feel like this.

3.

Safe in the light that surrounds me
Free of the fear and the pain
My questioning mind
Has helped me to find
The meaning in my life again

I'm 31.  I'm still young. It's funny to think that I was feeling old when I turned 30. But before I know it, I'll be like that. But That's the point. To stop and smell the roses.  I've smelled some good ones over the years. And I'm sure my daughter will too.

But she likes dandilions.

If I die tomorrow
I'd be alright
Because I believe
That after we're gone
The spirit carries on

(Contains lyrics from "The Spirit Carries On" by Dream Theater. No copyright infringement intended)