Dear Fred...Love, Hermione

Untitled Part 1

Dear Fred,

It's me. I know it is stupid but...I thought maybe writing to you would make that all feel better.

It has been almost a year now. We've all managed to cope. Just about...

Sometimes I feel like I can't anymore. You're laughing at me.

I know you are.

That's what I miss most about you.

You just smiled and...all my pain went away.

You remember Fourth Year, don't you?

Ron had got me crying and I just laid helplessly in my purple dress. Everyone looked down at me, not bothering to help me.

I don't really quite remember what you said Ron was...

But I think it was along the lines of "he's an idiotic, good-for-nothing prat". Although I think you used another word.

Whatever it was, it made me laugh.

I miss that.

It's not the same anymore.

For a while, the house was so quiet. No one did anything. No one wanted to.

We just wanted you back.

But we knew what you'd have said.

You'd tell us to buckle up and stop acting like some sentimental freaks.

George is much better now. He was a mess before. We were all so scared he was going to...hurt himself...

But, as I said, he's happier. He cracks jokes all the time.

I do too...

I've even started to help at the shop. I've realised that it can be a real laugh...

I even used one of your puking pastilles to get out of Potions one time! It really is extraordinary magic!

Ginny misses you so much...

For the first few weeks I actually slept in her bedroom.

Every night she'd wake up asking for her older brother.

The one who taught her Quidditch. The one who always teased her. The one who used to promise her sweets every time she got the Quaffle through. The one who gave her a worm instead.

And Ron...

He was the one who told everyone that it was going to be okay... He was the bravest. He helped us all through.

I was so used to him looking after us...I didn't know what to do when I saw him laying on the sofa, crying.

It was George that time, the one who helped him.

We saw the pain in his eyes, as he told Ron he was going to turn his lamp into a spider.

For a minute, we laughed. We knew that if you were there, you'd be laughing with us.

And you'd have turned that lamp into a spider.

And Ron would have probably scream.

It hurts.

It hurts to know that you're no longer here.

But as I said, we're doing better.

Mrs Weasley still knits you sweaters, scarves and gloves...

Fleur helps. Although I'm pretty sure you wouldn't like pink flowers on them...

Fleur has her daughter, Victoire.

And Ginny and Harry are finally together.

Don't worry, all the read-heads will kill Harry if he does anything to hurt your little sister.

I think back. Back to fourth year. After that joke you told me I looked beautiful. You said I always did. And that I looked way better with my main of bushy hair that could never be tamed. You even said you liked my crooked teeth better.

Then, you kissed me.

I wasn't sure what I was doing so I pushed you back. You blushed and looked away. Then this time, I kissed you. And you kissed back. I remember how Ginny reacted. She laughed. So did Harry. They didn't believe us, so you kissed me again.

Of course, your mother started planning our wedding. Although...We never got round to it...

Would we be married? Would we have children?

Imagine, two little babies, with crazy curly red hair, a streak of defiance and a love for books. Obsessed with rules... Yet with a passion to break them.

I'd probably have insisted on some name with meaning, and history.

You'd have named them Bob. Yes, both of them. Don't even try to deny it.

It was after the sky-battle when you first told me you loved me. It was perfect-romantic, sweet...

Then we ran into the Burrow after we heard George was hurt.

I realised... I never got to say that I loved you back...

But you knew, didn't you? You were my first love. The first person I ever loved. The person I'll always love. I love you, Fred Weasley.

With love, Hermione.