The Definition of Insanity.

Prologue

A friend of mine once quoted the wise words of Albert Einstein:

"Insanity is doing the same thing, over and over again, but expecting different results."

This spoke to me. And the moment I heard this, I quickly knew: I have been living a life of insanity. I instantly had the urge to write this on a piece of paper, in big letters, and post it on my refrigerator door; put it up where my mother could see it. But I doubt she would ever listen to me, even if I was holding a mega phone at her ear, screaming the words.

I've never been quite sure about what my mother was looking for as we moved from place to place.

I used to think it was safety. But then one minute my mom starts telling me to pack our bags. No reason given. Then I started to think she was running away because she felt guilty about a lot of things---things she didn't need to feel guilty about.

And the first few times we moved, I understood; but then I think we just started twisting and turning into random places because we weren't sure of where to go or what we were doing. We were avoiding the responsibilities of settling down.

We used to stay in places for at least a year or two. I'm not sure how it became a bad habit of ours.

Some people smoke, some people bite their nails, and my mom and I move twice a year.

And that was okay with me for a while. We drove all over the country, and I got to have some really great experiences that would've never had if we'd stayed in Cleveland or Pittsburgh or Stanford.

But it was lonely. A half a year was never enough time to make friends, so I just stopped trying. What was the point in getting attached to anyone, if I would just have to leave them anyways?

Then toward the end, each place was just a blur. Everything blends because everything is the same. All the high school students had their same old cliques, the subjects they teach you in school are the same, and the only difference was the setting.

Its a hard realization. That even though two things can be very different, they're primary parts are still the same. 

We did the same thing every time. We were afraid, and we moved. It was a cycle. 

A cycle of insanity.