To Forget The Past (Draft 1)

To Forget The Past: IX

Kane leaned in, moving his lips close to mine then beside my ear as my heart picked up its pace, I only hoped he couldn't hear the loud beats. "It was amazing." He whispered hoarsely, his warm breath tickling my ear as he spoke. Kane pulled away, a smile tugging at his lips while he looked at me, running his fingers down my arms. My breathing stopped, but not for the reason you'd think. I suddenly pushed Kane's arms away from me, roughly backing away.

My hand snapped to hold onto my arm. I looked away from Kane's eyes that were filled with a pained expression. Quickly walking past him, I pushed his hand away that stuck out to try to grab my arm to stop me from walking away. I leaned down, grabbing my shirt and pushed my way through the opening, walking back into the meadow.

"Everest, wait!" Kane grabbed my arm tightly, causing me to turn my body around to face him. I pulled my arm out of his grip aggressively.

"Don't. Don't touch me." My voice was low as I clenched my teeth together. Holding onto my arm tightly, pushing it closer to my body. Kane's eyes were dark, swirling with confusion, concern, and pain. I couldn't handle it.

I continued walking, picking up my camera and not even minding to put on my shoes and socks. The next thirty minutes were awkward as Kane kept glancing at me, asking what just happened; I only ignored him. I couldn't tell him why it would only lead to worse things. Rocks stabbed at the bottom of my bare feet, though my mind raced with thoughts, my breath heavier than normal. I couldn't stop thinking about my arms, and his hands; his hands on my arms.

Getting to the jeep, I sat down in the passenger's seat, making Kane have to drive. I haven't spoken a word to him since he grabbed my arm and he hadn't said a word either. Every once in awhile Kane threw me worried glances, I kept ignoring them, not answering the burning question: What did I do?

After we got back to the hotel, Kane gave me one last glance before I wrapped my Canon Camera and iPhone and left without Kane, going somewhere I hadn't been for years, somewhere that held all the memories I've tried so hard to forget.

~~~~~~

Throwing my legs off the tall building, I let the warm air hit my skin as I watched the town below. Few people walked around on the streets, talking with one another about whatever was or wasn't worth saying.

I sat on the edge, the sky layered with a cover of thin clouds, stretching over the small old town. The buildings were over fifty-something-years old, most made out of bricks that were sprayed down with graffiti by now. Still, this was home for me. My grandparents lived here so whenever my parents were out, I'd always come down here. Not a lot of kids were around though, but I never was one for being with multiple people.

I remember all the times I'd come up here. All the memories of Aaron and me crying from laughing too much over stupid jokes we'd share every time we were here together. I missed those times. I missed him.

Staring down at my fingers sitting in my lap, my eyes blurred causing my vision to become hazy. The stinging crept around the corners, making it almost impossible not to want to shut my eyes as tight as possible.

I held out my shaking arm, my breath didn't speak as I gazed deadly at my skin. You fuck up.

My throat let out a soft cry whilst I quickly hugged my arm into my tall figure and shut my eyes tightly, if I were to open them every single thing that I was holding in would pour out right then and there and I couldn't let that happen. Not again.