Goodbye, for now.

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I lost many things trough the years, maybe some that should've never been lost in the first place. I found some, but even with the promise of a father, lost them again. Maybe it was for the best in the end, because we'd be bound by soul and a loving connection of a family.

Part of a wizard's job is to fight, lose and keep standing their ground. You must win for them, or at the very least try for them. That's what I thought anyway, I still stand with this. Always have, because my family protects me, what kind of member would I be if I didn't do the same?

I'm sitting here by the local river as the sun begins to set, reflecting on my achievements, goals and with that heartbreaks too. Reminiscing trough them isn't my favourite part of today, but it can't be helped.

A wise man once said, "Sometimes your heart needs time to accept what your mind already knows,"  and Mavis was he right to say that. My mind always knew how the people who left won't magically come back.

There is not one type of magic who would bring someone the same as they were before. Change is inevitable, we all go trough it. And bringing back something that was long gone would make everything different, maybe even for the worst.

"Lucy..." The name rolled off my tongue by instinct. That's right, today marks a very special day. A day that would forever stay buried in my mind, whether in the corner or right there in front of my mind.

May 17th, the day I lost a person I couldn't replace. Lucy Heartfilia was a bubbly girl who insisted she wanted to join a wizard guild. There was one in particular that always stuck in her dreams until she was there with the Fairy Tail insignia on her hand.

I was right to grab her hand that night, to take her with me. Because when I did, I didn't know we'd go on a million adventures full of crazy situations in between. From the day we stole an S-class job and went to Galuna Island, to now.

I still remember our first job together, when Lucy dressed up as a maid and still didn't get in, so we went for plan B. Team Natsu was born just like that, and Virgo the celestial spirit signed a contract with her.

Then there was the Lullaby incident. It brought us all together, the most powerful team in Fairy Tail. It was a wild ride that one, something I would never dare to forget. 

I mentioned Galuna island once before, so I remember the Phantom Lord. Where we found out about Lucy's past, the day she showed her massive trust for me. By trust, I mean literally putting her life into my hands.

I can feel the tears building up in my eyes, threatening to surface. I kept them in of course, but I didn't notice the one that slipped down my cheek as Future Lucy's face surfaced in my mind, I lost her twice huh...

The pain was different somehow when I knew that my Lucy was really going to disappear and never come back. I remember screaming how I wanted to go to Eclipse and back in time so I could run and protect her like I was supposed to do.

"It's not your fault Natsu, you've been the greatest friend I could ask for...you made my life perfect until now, thank you..."

Followed by my rampage and broken heart, that night I destroyed the city of Galleria.  I didn't see anything clearly, everything was blurred by my tears. All sound blocked out by the ringing in my head.

I contain a sob as my remember the colour slowly leaving Lucy's bright face, her eyes losing the vibrant colour they used to hold. I remember her cold hand falling from my cheek and the weak smile she put on as her eyes closed.

"Thank you, Natsu..."

"What, no...you can't leave..." I took her hand nearly dropping it from the freezing skin. My body shook as tears started dropping from my eyes.

"You're shaking...are you cold?" She asked as if she wasn't there dying because of the deep would that cut straight trough her stomach. I quickly grabbed my cloak pressing it against it but failing to stop the blood from spilling.

"Hold on...okay...I just need to...I..." I can't even collect my thought as my body trembled with the fear of losing my everything. No, I won't lose her. I can't let her go just yet, we still have adventures to go on.

"Hey, Natsu..." Lucy tried to smile but coughed instead as her magic was leaving her body. She tried again and her eyes glistened against the fire surrounding us.

"It will be okay, I'll get you to Wendy and...she'll help...you'll be fine..." I breathed heavily, my lungs beginning to fail me. I felt like my whole body was shutting down, this wasn't happening...no it's just a nightmare.

"Natsu, you know I won't make it..." Lucy lifted her pale hand up to my cheek and gave me a smile that seemed to make me cry harder, even it was possible.

"Yes, you will...don't say such things, Luce..." I pressed down on the wound, avoiding hurting her fragile body. But to no avail.

"Natsu...I'll always watch over you..." she smiled up as her thumb brushed against my cheeks, I knew she wanted me to calm down but I couldn't stop my emotions.

"We still have adventures to go on...this isn't...you..." There I go again, my words are missing their ends and my mind is going blank. My breathing is ragged and my hands are shaking, maybe that's why it won't stop.

"For now, our adventure has to stop..." the blonde below me frowned as if she was recalling the ones we already went trough, thinking about the things we said and didn't say.

"No...not now..." I flinched thinking about a job without her, it wouldn't be fun. It would just be a job...not an adventure. Nothing more than something to get money out of.

"Yes, now. Only, for now, one day we can carry on, okay?" She coughed and I shivered at her words, for now, is too long.

"Twice...I can't lose you twice..." I sobbed, making out every possible excuse for the celestial mage to stay with me.

"Stop making up excuses..." she giggled weakly, I knew she was slipping away now. 

"Please don't go..." I felt like collapsing and just letting myself burn with the raging flames that were spreading across the land.

"Goodbye, for now..." 

"You can't leave me, Luce!" 

"Thank you, Natsu..." Lucy's hand fell down from my cheek, landing on her chest which had stopped moving.

"...come back..."


I wiped the tears that decided to fall, she was right,

we could always continue our adventure later.

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Thank you for reading this short little book!

I'm not the best at angsty type fanfictions but this one was just stuck in my head and I couldn't help but write it out (:

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