I made a mistake

Flowers for our girl

He just starts walking down the street and I walk along side him. I'm still trying to wipe tears out of my eyes that I don't realize where we're going until we get there. Langley Memorial Cemetery. He walks over to my grave and lays down next to my headstone. It's a pale white dove carved out of marble, preparing to fly away. On its wing in small letters is my name.

Kessie Goldbrooke beloved daughter and friend.

I lay down beside him. The place were they buried me is pretty enough, it's got a fountain three rows down from me and a lot of flowers and it's quiet. My foster parents thought it was a good place for me. I was only with them for a month, but that didn't lessen the damage. They don't think they can have another kid, after my suicide. They've left town, but they still pay the funeral home to leave me flowers. A wreath of white and yellow roses decorates my grave but I just look at Jim. He lays flat on his back with the palms of his hands pointed toward the blue sky. His eyes are closed and he almost looks peaceful, but I can still see the outline of a grimace on his face. He just barely whispers my name "Kessie." I slip my hand into his. "I'm here Jim."
He takes a deep breath. "Hey Kessie. I just wanted you to know that I love you." Jim's voice breaks as tears fall down his cheeks. "I-I saw your painting in school again today, but I think you already know that. I remember when I called you little mermaid for the first time. My beautiful, dorky mermaid." He lets out a pained chuckle. "I-I still can't believe you're not here anymore. That-that you're buried here. I wish I could have saved you. Mermaid I wish I could have saved you."
I close my red and tear stained eyes and gently kiss his cheek. "No one could have saved me baby. I hid it and that day, I was determined." I wrap my arms around him and kiss his head. "Please, please don't blame yourself. You were my Prince Charming, Jim you were perfect. I just-," I gulp down air trying to put my words together. I start sobbing again, holding him so tightly, even though he can't feel it and can't hear me, I hope that somehow he'll hear this. "I-I made a mistake! I love you so much! I should have found a way to stay but I didn't and I'm sorry. Jim I love you!"