Music

Cellotopia

Once upon a time, there was a kingdom called Cellotopia. It was ruled by the head dictator cello and her co-dictator cello. The other three were the empire's, secretary, treasurer and commander in chief. These five cellos ruled the land peacefully. The basses were the military, big, strong, and constant. They made sure that nobody had any thoughts about changing the tempo that the empire was run at. The violas were the empire's nobles. Nobody really knew where they came from, and it was only after a great length of time that the populas came to know of them. The ignorance called them "big shot violins", but the violas themselves said they were "mini cellos". The cellos sided with the violas. Lastly, the violins. There were the chair and their cohort "second chair". The complacent ones were the second violins, who did nothing of import really. They were all happy for years in Cellotopia. 

Cellotopia enjoyed many symphonies of existence, with the violins doing the main visible work and the cellos and basses keeping them in check. The violas came out once in a while, when everyone retarded into a walking pace of life, and returned them back to a tempo the same as the first. When the violins tried to revolt, the basses would crescendo into staccato bow shots to bring them back into the balanced society so all voices in the fugue of life could be heard on the subject of running Cellotopia. But sometimes the revolutionaries would bring up a subject to counter the one they would not answer to. This riff of action would repeat multiple times, normally with different first and second endings. When discordence arose, everybody's bows tensed, ready to launch offensively scaled attacks and withdraw into a quieter dynamic if it would save their lives and pet frogs. Eventually though, they would leave their forte to join back into the melody of the empire. The cellos and basses would back off briefly, to allow the violins and violas to run the domestic performance again. 

The players in the song of the empire were now in harmony. Unfortunately, not all the populas had gone without harm, their frogs had lost their eyes, and were now blind (this would later turn out to nickname their archer owners Blind Frog Bows). That made the lesson of the last major movement make a mark at all those involved. Everyone loved their frogs, for without them, the impact of the bow was not the same. 

Sometimes the violas would go on minor vacation, which everyone in the empire called a rest, and when they came back, their new grasp on their position would change the key of the theme of Cellotopia's lifestyle. Everything went peacefully for a moment of time, but then the basses changed the rhythm of the beat in the 6-8 months of the 44 year of the cello's reign. In their excitement for a new movement, the violins started accidently wrecking trains for a while. The violas tried to follow the code a' conduct or overide the violins, but they were too quiet. Then the cellos picked up where the violas left off. They were none to gentle. They accented each of their blows with a flat voiced tirade that fell sharp upon the ears. The final chords of resolution for the revolution came from a duet of cellos and violas playing to flood Cellotopia with the sound of their voices like the seas. The second violins appeared from the wings of the termoil as soon as the tempo of llife returned to normal. 

Author's Note: This was by no means written to offend someone over a bit of discordance on views. A cellist and violist composed this while eating after a really long rehersal and wanted to get a bunch of the terms out of the maelstrom of chords in their heads. They had not experienced much kindness from the highstrung violins just before, and wanted to get their revenge in a way that hopefully wouldn't rankle any egos *cough* violins *cough cough*. So, this has been a short and detatched, painful, punny description of the beginnings of Cellotopia. I will soon upload a repeat of this, but with band members and instruments that will likely be flutetastic. Welp, that's that and over and out and all that jazz.