Chapter 3

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"Ding ding ding"

The last bell of the day went off and I made a bee line for my car. Then I remembered that I have to wait for Charles.

*DAMN IT! That means he's going to try talk to me...again!

I waited in the car for him, and when he finally came out I turned the music up a little and maybe he would get the hint that were not talking. Charles climbed in the car and just stared at me for a little bit then buckled up and told me to go.

*Thank you lord! Have mercy on his soul for not talking!!*

I pulled into the parking lot of Hazel's school, I made sure to pull right up to the front so she could find us. As usual she got in and slammed the door and out of irritation I turned around and yelled at her.

"HAZEL DON'T SLAM THE DAMN DOOR HOW MANY TIMES DO I HAVE TO TELL YOU THAT?!?!

I could see the tears welling up in her eyes and I began to feel awful... All I could think was how now she is gonna hate me and not talk to me ever again. So I jumped out of the car like a ninja and went over to her. Pulled her out of the car and squeezed her tight and said sorry till I cried. She didn't deserve that at all, how is she suppose to know what I'm going through? I gently put her in her seat and buckled her up and went and got Lizzy from day-care. She was sleeping when we got there so I just put her in the car ever so gently. And we were quiet all the way home, my favorite!

As I pulled into the garage and put it in park Hazel jumped from the car, running to the house before I could say hey. I didn't bother taking Lizzy out of her carriage because she was still snoring, mom probably would be mad because now she wasn't gonna go to bed her normal time. Oh well I'm not waking her up! Charles followed me into the house still not saying a word since the high school parking lot, I was a little worried.

I put Lizzy in her crib and left her to sleep. Checked on Hazel, she was coloring and being good. I was making my way to my room thinking I could sneak in before Charles saw me. Well...no such luck. As I turned the corner there he was standing against the wall just watching and waiting.

*Creepy!*

I just moved quiet and fast, made it half way aanndd there he was!

*GRR why??? Noo let me be! For real? Why is everyone crawling up my rear?*

"Rosa your gonna have to talk me at one point or another.."

"Yeah? And who's gonna make me?"

"Well I'll just follow you and wait till you spill."

"Charles PLEASE just stop, you don't and you can't understand this.."

"Rosa please don't shut me out! I love you, your my little sister...I'm going to worry weather you tell me to or not"

"CHARLES JUST STOP!"

"Why are you yelling?"

"Because you won't leave me the hell alone! I told you I don't want to talk about it and you keep pestering me!"

"Well maybe if you hadn't tried to take your life last year I wouldn't worry so much...."

"Get out of room, take care of the girls."

I pushed him out and shut the door, sat on my bed and just hugged my pillow and cried. I could feel the hot and salty tears hitting my lips and leaving the tear Stan on the pillow. Closed my eyes and it flashed back, like a surreal nightmare. Three months ago, my life fell apart onto my shoulders just left for me to live with. There was no living with it and there was no way getting past it. I was stuck. Stuck in my fear of re-living that night all over again.

*Flashback*

He was suppose to love me, care for me, be my friend, my boyfriend, hold me till the end of time, he was suppose to be the one. Tuesday two weeks he ruined it all, he turned my world upside down and stomped on my heart. I was a virgin till that night, and he knew I wanted to wait till the perfect time, so it would be special. That was it, I knew that going to be the night I gave him my innocence and I was okay with that. I was 100% prepared, emotionally and physically. He made that night perfect and I was so happy, I felt like I was on cloud 9, everything was perfect.

We were sitting on his bed holding hands just talking, home alone, music was playing and then he kissed my lips ever so gently. Then he pulled me in close and kissed me again, and again. At this point we were lying down and he was on top of me, we were just kissing. Next thing I knew I was taking his shirt off and mine was gone. Shirtless...this was new for me...a little nerve wracking too. But I just went with it because I knew that this was it. Just a few short minutes later, pants were gone. It was all happening so fast I didn't know what was going on. But I felt a bubbly happy feeling rising in my stomach. Then..it..happened. He pulled up and then was in. I gasped but let him be as he pulled in and out, then slowly went harder and faster, in...out...in...out...in..out..in and eventually I was running out of breath, but in some way I loved every minute of it. As he pulled out of me, he kissed me and rolled over to lay beside me. Then he got out of the bed, stood up, looked me dead in the eye and said, okay go home. I was baffled, I had no words. None. All I managed was,

"Excuse me?"

"You heard me, leave!"

"What the hell? I just had sex with you and your kicking me out?"

"Yes, I'm done with you now."

"Oh.my.GOD!"

I gathered my things and got out of there, cried all the way home and climbed in the window just so no one would see me. Now I think I'm dealing with something even bigger...

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