Too Young, Too Dumb

November. My favorite month. I relate to the month. I know, sounds stupid, but listen. People want to skip past me to something better, something more cheerful and cozy. It's not enough. Nobody is satisfied. I'm lonely.

I'm Ren. I'm a skinny teenaged boy who just wants to have some purpose.

Well, another day alive. Congrats Ren Jenson. You did it. Lived.

It's cold today so I put on my old sweatshirt that is way to big for me. I'm 17, have brown hair, and green eyes. Nothing about me is special. I'm just your regular old depressed teenager who loves to rebel! Yipee!

School. School, school. And more school. It's 6 am, too fucking early. Way to early. I stayed up til' 2 am last night. Bad choice. I make a lot of those.

I go to the bathroom and do anything you'd do before you go to school.

My dad and his girlfriend are fighting, he sees me and tells me to come over to him.

"Nick! Get your ass here! Tell this slut that im right!" Ya my first name is Nicholas. I hate that name because my mom came up with it. She left. She left because she didn't want me. She thought I was was the worst thing that happened to her. I'm glad she's dead. That sounds terrible, but it's true. She's psycho! When I was younger she tried to fucking kill me! Like why the hell would you do that to your own kid! A little kid! Any kid! Maybe I should've died.

Anyways, I don't want to get in thier stupid fight so I sneak out the window. I find my skateboard and ride to the school. It's overcast out and the trees are dropping their leaves. The wind is crisp and nice although it's cold.

No one is there yet, school doesn't start for another hour. I wait about 30 minutes and some kids start showing up.