The Luna Eclipse

••Chapter 18••

Its been days since I've seen or talked to either Kaiden or Cade. It was like they'd completely fallen off the face of the earth. But they hadn't. Both of them had been purposely ignoring me and it was breaking my heart.

Yes, I know what you're thinking; right now I'm basically acting like a slutty bitch, liking two guys at the same time and not knowing who is the right one. For me that is.

Liz and I had been chatting over Skype most days and we talked endlessly about what has been happening. Liz thinks I should give Cade a chance. That he's different then he used to be, even though she never knew him before now. She believes that he's trying to be better for me, but I'm not sure that that is a good thing.

On the other hand Brent wants me to be with Kaiden. He thinks that Cade is a two-faced jerk who is just playing me-pretending to be someone he's not.

I've tried to contact Kaiden, but he's not having it. He's ignored every single text I've sent him and could I really blame him? I wouldn't be surprised if he had found out that I'd thrown myself at Cade. I missed him and I felt guilty about what had happened. It's like my heart is playing tricks on me. One moment it wants Kaiden and the next it wants Cade. It's really not helping me in the long run.

Like I do every night since he's been ignoring me, I ring his cell. I wait for it to go immediately to voice-mail, but it doesn't. His voice on the other end answers. "Yes?" His voice sounds tired and its so unlike him I almost start crying.

"I'm so sorry." I whisper into the phone, my voice breaking. "I'm sorry and I love you and I miss you so, so much. Come back to me, please." My words meet stone cold silence and I'm not surprised. "Kai, please talk to me." After what feels like hours, but was probably only minutes he answers.

"I forgive you." He tells me and I know I should feel better at hearing those words, but I don't. That's the problem, I don't feel better I still feel guilty and I know why.

"I kissed Cade." I murmur into the phone. "I know it was wrong and I feel so guilty. I realised my mistake and it stopped. I promise. I wanted to tell you the truth."

"I know, and I forgive you." He repeats and I still don't feel better at all, but I told him the truth. It was a mistake, and I did feel guilty. But it didn't mean I didn't like it. Or that I wanted it to never happen again. Never having Cade's lips on mine again was like asking me to never drink water for the rest of my prolonged life.

"How do you know?"

"Brent told me. He was at the bar having drinks with a friend and saw Cade go into the bathroom after you. When you both came out separately with swollen lips he assumed and immediately told me." He pauses. "I almost had sex with another girl. That's why I'm not mad. I'd be a hypocrite if I did."

"You'd be a hypocrite if you got mad? How are our situations the same. All I did was peck a guy on the lips you almost full on went for a home run!" I exclaim, exasperated. "Oh my, God. All this time I was feeling guilty for kissing Cade and you were trying to get it up with another girl."

"At least it wasn't my mate. I had no feelings for her which is why I couldn't do it. He's you're mate, you already have feelings for him. Kissing him would only make them stronger."

"I'm sorry for kissing him, I am. But I cant talk to you right now. I'll talk to you later when I'm more settled down."

I sit on the bed with my phone in between my lap, face in my hands repeating "Dios mio" all over again, even though I'm not Spanish. I honestly couldn't believe it. The fact that he had almost cheated on me was the only thing running through my mind for hours as I cried myself to sleep.