Strong Character, the Key to Happiness

Happiness -something everybody wants but not something everyone can fully get. Everything around us is a product of man's constant endeavour to achieve this elusive feeling (Dalai Lama, n.d.). Over the years, development and progress in modern society provided men services, security and comfort in the hopes of finding happiness within it (Orozco, n.d.). It is because of the very definition of the word, which is the absence of pain and suffering, that man constantly developed products and services in order to make life easier (Dalai Lama, n.d.). However, despite the efforts of improving our society, happiness moves even farther from man's reach and men might have been doing it all wrong. Man's idea of accumulating money in order to buy these services is not the best way to achieve happiness. It is actually something intangible, that is, a strong character moulded by time and good relationships.

Suffering, the enemy of happiness, is the only thing that prevents a person from being happy. Some blame the supernatural being that governs the world for allowing pain to thrive in the world. However, according to C.S. Lewis, it is only God's way of accommodating man's freedom. It is because God will not forcefully correct a person or else it would contradict his very being of being perfect and his decision to give man freedom. With this being said, man had its own choices to choose from the different ways in obtaining happiness.

One example is that money can buy happiness. This is probably the most basic concept which man had arrived in order to attain happiness. It is because of its ability to buy our wants which can make our life easier, more comfortable and more pleasurable. Some examples are the present technologies where one can get everything done in a flick of a hand. This, power of money, is the reason why we give importance to education; in order to find a job that pays well to buy these services, technologies and necessities.

With the present conditions, finding a job can be very difficult and sometimes end up in unemployment. Without a job, apparently, one cannot find happiness. All they will receive is a very stressful life because of the many bills that needs payments, the inability to fulfil their financial obligations to their family, etc. In order to escape this nightmare, they engage in alcohol and drugs which will give them a feeling of ecstasy. However, this feeling is transitory, because the following day would be a day of headaches and hangovers. By escaping this nightmare through alcohol and drugs, man actually created its own suffering by relying on physical happiness (Bacz, 1999). Not only do they cause harm to themselves but also to the people around them. Although drugs and alcohol are not the only cause of crime, it causes fear in the people's hearts because they know that a playful stroll in the night might end up in a coffin the following day. However, with discipline, one may be able to control their vices and transform this problem of unemployment into an opportunity of bonding with the family and nurturing the character of each every member of the family.

Drugs and alcohol are not the only suffering man has built for himself. It also includes everything money can buy like gadgets, contraception and services.

The rise of new technologies made man more independent through the reliance on machineries (Dalai Lama, n.d.). One example, specifically on agriculture, was given by The Dalai Lama in his essay "The Modern Society and the Quest for Human Happiness" where, in the past, a farmer would call for help from his family in planting, while in the present, it just takes the farmer and its tractor, seeder, sprinkler, etc. to complete the job. Now, most farmers would prefer this procedure because it is faster, easier and better without bothering his family to help. However, this creates a gap between the bonds among family members. The fact that some parents have no idea who their children are, as a person, is a proof that this gap really exists. Another example is the all-inclusive wireless local area network, WiFi. Although the purpose of WiFi is to connect the users all over the globe, its existence actually widened the existing gap. That gap has widened because face-to-face communication was substituted by virtual socializing and thus creating a false sense of connection. Furthermore, this virtual socializing fostered poor social skills which in turn worsened the feeling of isolation in people. No wonder emotional and mental healths of people have become more frayed than ever. This encourages people to focus on their selves and be apathetic towards others (Dalai Lama, n.d.). By being selfish, one experiences Hell (Lewis, 1990). It is because by being selfish, one confines himself from the beauty of the world and the joy of being in the company of others which is the essence of being human and the trait thriving in Heaven (Lewis, 1990). Aside from this, man also lacks patience and perseverance to work hard in order to perform a certain activity and relies on technology on performing the necessary tasks.

At the same time, with the current technology, one can hone its potential to the fullest by focusing on one's career and talents. By allocating most of our time working our fingers to the bone in the hopes of getting a promotion or earning a raise, one sacrifices the quality time intended for the family (Miceli, 2013). It is very really ironic that the very reason for our perseverance towards work, which is for the welfare of our family, is being set aside in fulfilling it. This sacrifice, according to Elizabeth Corey, is the kind of predicament working mothers are in. By focusing on their careers, they disregard one nature of human beings which is connecting to one another. They work day and night and the family life that would have been spent for bonding has become a rare commodity instead. This sacrifices the well-being of their family, most especially the identity of their children, by focusing on self-culture and failing to perform their obligation as the light of the family through communication. As mothers, it is their duty to listen and guide their family and wholly offer themselves to help their family in any way possible; without it, the family can end up in turmoil. Worst of all, the children can fall astray and lose their identity becoming rebels.

Lack of communication, resulting from poor social skills, is a major blunder to relationships. It is because it can cause misunderstandings that can cause a fight which can hurt both parties. Besides, communication is a binding material that contributed to the rise of civilizations. Our ancestors were able to formulate ideas by interacting with each other and discussing their observations among themselves. The technologies we possess now would never exists without the contributions of the early thinkers (Miceli, 2013). Therefore, man can never claim that his fellow men is a burden or a worthless trash.

Respect. One of the ingredients needed for a good relationship. This is something the modern youth lacks that is why some people view children as a hindrance to cultivating on of one's talents because you need to spend time nurturing them without an assurance of a good reward later on. As a result, the use of contraception has become highly acceptable and advisable. However, Micheli says otherwise. According to her, it does not only delay childbirth; it prevents motherhood which is the source of happiness of every woman. It also destroys the true relation between marriage and sex which results to broken families who need counsel from relatives. Besides, it has always been a firm belief in the past that children are the source of happiness in the family and by preventing this, technically, prevents happiness from thriving within a family. The use of contraception also damages a woman's health causing them to suffer from these sexually transmitted diseases.

Varied services offered to the society also prevents happiness from happening. It is because the modern society has been used to services that they abused this thing that brings comfort to their lives and have this mentality of entitlement and whichever service that fails to meet their standards causes dissatisfaction. This mentality also became the root of slavery or bullying which is stealing someone's source of happiness. Modern society values money above all else because of its said ability which turns us into greedy monsters who lives in "fear of losing its wealth and hope of gaining more (Dalai Lama, n.d.)" in any way possible which sometimes may be illegal which the root of our suffering. However, all of these suffering can be avoided with a strong character.

The distinct difference between a country with a materialistic mentality and a country that focuses on the spirituality, beliefs and traditions defines the level of happiness a member of that country can achieve (Orozco, n.d.). Because, if a man is grateful, they will not feel envy that will encourage them to accumulate more money than what he has. Instead, they will be selfless and share their blessings to the others sharing happiness to one another. They will not be blinded by money and firmly stand in their principles and they will not suffer from the problems they will encounter. If ever this fail, they will remain optimistic and look at their problems from a different perspective. These are things that makes a strong character that ensures a person's happiness because happiness is being satisfied with one's life.

References:

1. Merceli, Angela. (December 6, 2013). The pursuit of Feminine Excellence. Retrieved. February 18, 2014. From http://www,mercatornet.com/articles/view/the_pursuit_of_feminine_excellence.

2. Backz, Jacek. (n.d.). C.S. Lewis the Problem of Pain. Retrieved Febuary 18, 2014. From http://www.catholiceducation.org/articles/apolgetics/ap0032.html

3. The Dalai Lama. (n.d.). Modern Society and the Quest for human Happiness.

4. Orozco, Francisco. (n.d.). What is the Quality of Life?