Hungry for Release

Part 12

Sighing, Zayn did as his youngest bandmate asked, and crawled into Harry's warm pod. With the three of them inside, it felt like they were three little boys playing in a fort. Louis had a cheeky grin on his face, and Zayn couldn't help smiling too at the ridiculousness of the situation. 

Harry's face was deadly serious though. Wordlessly, he showed his phone to Zayn.

“Got something huge to tell you. Promise you’ll keep it secret?” it read. Zayn nodded, his heart in his throat. Was Harry finally taking the plunge to go solo? He’d said he wasn’t ready when they’d discussed it just a few weeks ago.

They all knew he’d go eventually, but for now, he’d claimed he still wanted to be one of a band, and build up his skills. But after all the angst, nobody could really blame him for performing an about turn. Louis looked equally anxious.

He passed an iPad to the pair, warning them to keep silent - which was fortunate, as Zayn had to try very hard to stop himself exclaiming out loud when he saw the note that Harry had written.

 "Been to some private meetings on the side of my PR fun in LA. Got us an amazing new management deal lined up. Dad has been helping with his lawyer. Couldn’t tell you as I’ve been watched so closely up until now, and I didn’t want to get anyone’s hopes up. Can drop Modest in two months. Be free of the bullies!!! Freeeeee!!! No more being dressed by idiots. No more policing our private lives.

No more stupid branded toothbrushes (unless we want to), staged paparazzi shots or gross perfume deals - we're over exposed enough. More freedom, more privacy, just being ourselves. Yes?! Just need to sign it. Will send you contracts to check etc. 

Sorry has to be this way, but no other chance to talk to you guys alone :( won't let me be by myself at all at the moment. Don’t mention this to ANYONE though, not until we’re all agreed. OK? Had a few quiet words with Uncle Simon, he agrees to support us, so long as we don’t go public with any Modest business. I am his pet after all ;) " 

Zayn sat for a second, taking it all in, before reaching for his phone. "Let's do it. :D" he typed. "Can we get it sorted tomorrow?"

Harry broke out into one of his trademark megawatt smiles, nodding happily, his fingers reaching out to intertwine with Louis’, who wore a hopeful but dazed expression. 

Of course, it wasn’t so cut and dried as all that. Liam has been as instantly eager as Zayn and Louis when Harry dragged him to one side to reveal the plan the next morning, but Niall was slightly dubious.

Coming from a conservative family, he was wary of rocking the boat, and nervous about making the change after three years. He’d claimed it was out loyalty to Modest - but Louis ribbed him that it was more like Stockholm Syndrome.

It took him over a week to decide. They were sat in a diner, having slipped away for a quiet dinner. Zayn was nervously pushing around his food, preoccupied with thoughts of a photoshoot the next morning.

After the initial burst of optimism, his anxiety had returned with full fury, and he’d woken up that morning a bag of nerves, flinching at every little thing. His jeans felt tight and uncomfortable, but he refused to accept a size up. This was bloody big enough.

Louis and Harry were sat diagonally across from each other, paranoid about being caught out by the paparazzi, but, having had a few beers, Louis kept leaning over Niall to whisper to Harry anyway. It was pretty annoying, but Zayn was fairly oblivious, wrapped up in his thoughts.

“Would you two cut it out? I’ve got to get to the gym before bed, and I don’t want to be here all night,” Liam barked, causing Zayn to blanche.

“Sorry man,” Harry murmured quietly, gently sliding his hand back under the table. 

“Yeah, sorry Liam,” Louis muttered. “Didn’t you already work out today? You look exhausted mate. Have some more beer and a sleep instead.”

“Yeah…” admitted Liam slowly. “But they said...they said the other day that I looked too...plain in the latest promo shots. Being buff is supposed to be my ‘thing’, and if I even skimp a little I just look…”

Zayn nodded sympathetically, shovelling chicken in his mouth. He could feel himself speeding up with every bite. There was no way he’d go to bed tonight without purging after the long day they’d had.

Nobody else knew what to say.

“Oh...Look at you! Look at yourselves. This is ridiculous. Guys, I’ll sign the new deal, on one condition,” Niall cried out, slapping the table forcefully. “You all cheer the fuck up. I don’t care you if all need to go to rehab...or space...or, or, or…”

“Space? What?” Louis broke in, looking confused.

“NSYNC. Know your boyband history,” Niall replied, looking smug. “Whatever. Let’s do it. Just stop looking like somebody died already. Geez.”

Calmly, he picked up his burger and tore out a massive chuck, closing his eyes in satisfaction. The others stared at him, a little stunned.

“Well,” Harry said eventually, “I’ll send the email later. Hold on to your hats boys,” he raised his eyebrows devilishly, “things are gonna get real.”

They’d all had a few drinks in the hotel bar that night, loudly calling out to everyone that they were having a lads night. None of them dared talk about the new deal where management lackeys might have overheard.

Some had indulged more than others. Zayn tore off his clothes and dove into bed that night, pleasantly buzzed. He’d definitely had too many calories...but for now, that felt OK. He probably should purge or do some exercises or something, but amazingly, he just didn’t care.

An unusual feeling was tugging inside his chest, a light, fluttery feeling. He didn’t want to jinx it - but it may just have been a little surge of hope.