Da G8 Story of how Brendon Urie made merica great again wit Michy

Michy Da Potato and Rich-doody the unicorn and Emu banks

Read da shit peeplez. It good and tru emo for da emus.

Once upon a time, in a continent many miles away, there lived a warty bright orange potato. It was a Scottish potato, bred from a scandalous affair between Mike Wazowski and a purebred Scottish biology teacher that was more than a little wacko in the head. However, the organism immigrated to China after a rather intimate and embarrassing incident involving unicorn dildos and a Samsung Note 7. The name of the limp, sickly, damp yellowishly orange specimen that is a part of the perennial nightshade Solanum tuberosum is Michy de la Legoliomanikas del Mahinshika. Through the endlessly limited thing called LaMarck's theory of evolution, Michy de la legoliomanikas del Mahinshika the potato managed to learn how to work one of those strange device thingys called a "cell phone" and downloaded this app that the elderly call "the Twitter".

As the years passed, Michy learned more and more about the fancy gadget and the intricate Chinese culture. Michy was also introduced to another fancy schmancy technological device that she heard was called a "computer" by the English-speaking Scottish cows of that work in the busy factories of China. On this "computer", Michy was able to access her account on "the Twitter" and search the great vast web for hot Adelie penguin sex with hardcore rock emo emo emo EMO EMOOOOO music in the background to get off on.

And life was great fo the ugly saggy tit potato. There was always enough Greek penguin porn to read, emo music to listen to, milk to shower intimately with, and hamsters to murder. Michy couldn't have asked for more.

But then, bad stuff happens and ruins Michy's immaculate life, cuz that's how all fics go.

On the fateful day of April ninth, two things occurred. One of them was wonderful and the other was useless and completely irrelevant. The first thing that happened was that Michy the potato found a glowing neon pink rock while prancing around one of the great majestic mountains someplace in China. The other was that Michy's twitter account was hacked by a unicorn in Scotland.

Since finding the glowing neon pink rock is obviously the important thing that happened on April ninth, Michy decides to go on a mission that the neon pink rock told her to go on. In a deep, sorrowful, and philosophical voice, the rock croaked out its last dying words "Rich-doody the unicorn will take over once the breaks over. Make sure you stay in your lane. Now go find your Rich-Doody and make sure to beware of the ssexy hot guillotine." Then the rock croaked, shedded its rough Donald Trump like outer rock layer, turned into a neon purple frog, and hopped away jovially without a care in the world .

"Noooooo!" Michy the potato cried in fearful agony as she daydreams about this sexy unicorn called Rich-Doody. Michy ever so gently places the rock remains inside of an empty ice cream tub. Then Michy viciously flings the hot ice cream carton off the side of the mountain and lets out a terrifying roar. Michy also wants to fuk the cold cream and feel it caress all of the smooth curves of her wrinkly saggy titty bod.

Michy the potato gathered up her old, ratty, potato-sized broomstick that was made up of weathered straw and mucky mud. Cautiously, Michy hopped onto the back of the broom stick, yelled "avada kenta" and sped off into the smoggy, dull, and smelly Chinese horizon.

It takes a total of 4.666 hours for Michy to get to Scotland on the back of the magical broomstick that she oh so cunningly stole from Justin Beaver's guard name Fred. Then Michy took a total of three hours and forty five minutes to find a highway in Scotland and a bearded guy that looked like a communist Trump supporting farmer that runs a gardening club at a local middle school and is on the run from the government but likes to recite Friar Lawrence's soliloquy about flowers from Romeo and Juliet because it reminds him of green herbal substances. The clouds were singing a song marched along in the dark, stormy sky that shimmered with natural Brazilian glitter. Taking a deep inhalation of sexy Cheeto dust and glitter, Michy the potato took a pit stop to search on goggle intense cuCUMber and pickle organic sex to get itself off the edge of a great cliff climbing back up and falling all apart. The bearded guy that looked like a communist farmer that runs a gardening club in a local middle school and is on the run from the government but likes to recite Friar Lawrence's soliloquy about flowers from Romeo and Juliet because it reminds him of green herbal substances turns to look at the potato, which is now hopping along the side of the highway. Michy juts out a hand and puts a thumb up. It's not long before a golf cart being driven by a piece of kimchi rolls up to Michy.