Loving You (Cameron Dallas One Shot)

Part 1

*****PROLOGUE*****

"Answer me!!! Are you seeing someone else?" I cried to my boyfriend, who has been tearing me apart by the second. He stays quiet with his head in his hands.

"Seriously, Cameron. Don't lie to me. Are you seeing someone else?" I ask again.

He takes a deep breath before speaking up.

"I think so." He looks up at me with regret and guilt.

I never thought three words could hurt me so much. It felt like I had been stabbed a thousand times right through the chest, over and over again. This boy, has changed my life so much the past YEAR, and now I'm hearing that he doesn't love me anymore. He wants more... Someone with more quality and more beauty. More talent and less insecurity. And none of that is me. None of that is Marissa Emory Dikes. I'm the girl with all the insecurity. I'm the girl who can't find her talent yet, but I'm trying. I'm the girl who doesn't exactly think she's the prettiest girl in the world. I guess what I'm hearing is that Cameron doesn't want me. Anymore....

*****2 MONTHS LATER*****

I walk down the hallway of Baylor High. I go to my locker of 4 years. Yes, it's senior year. I'm ready to get away from all of these people. I feel like everyone wants to judge me just by looking at me. In their eyes, everyone has at least something to judge about me. I have only 1 friend, who isn't even my best friend. I just hang out with her because I don't want to look like a loner and eat my lunch in the bathroom like Cady off of Mean Girls. I know it's stupid, but would you not do it too?

My locker is number 155, in the corner of the main high school hallway on the left building, away from everyone else. Unfortunately, today when I went to my locker, I saw two people I never wanted to see ever again. Cameron and his new.... Girlfriend, Rachel Howard. I hate Rachel Howard. Not just because she took the one I cared most about, but because of just simply "her". She wears the least amount of clothing (which means she's way too confident, just how Cameron wants), her annoying voice, which screeches every time she talks, and her stupid talent of dancing. She's on Baylor High's dance team. She goes all over the world and competes against all kinds of other dancers. And even though I absolutely hate to say it, she's pretty good.

Luckily, I don't have any class with her, but I do have almost every class but one with Cameron. We've been lab partners in Science, but we haven't actually had a conversation since 2 months ago, when we had our very last fight here after school.

I saw him with his arm wrapped tightly around her exposed stomach, as she had her arm stretched up his shirt, exposing his 6-pack. I looked away quickly when I saw him staring. I then ignored the two of them and hurriedly put in the combination in my lock.

I never though Rachel would talk to me, though. Until today. I felt a light tap on my shoulder which made me turn around. She stood there with a raised eyebrow and crossed arms. I glanced back over to the corner I saw them both at, and Cameron was nowhere to be seen.

"I saw you staring at my boyfriend.." She says as she smacks her gum annoyingly. I waited for a second, thinking she would continue. She didn't.

"And......?" I raised an eyebrow back at her and she rolls her eyes.

"Don't play stupid! You better stop looking at him, I mean it. He's mine now. He's not interested and he never was. He's always wanted me, so why don't you turn around and keep your eyes on other guys, K?" She fake smiled, then stomped off.

She was right. He isn't into me. He never was. He played me and made me think I was being loved by someone. Growing up, I didn't have much. I have 4 other siblings, which my parents payed most attention to. I was the middle child. I wasn't as important as they were. I didn't get great things for Christmas like they did. Heck, we didn't even celebrate my birthday! The only thing they did was look at the calendar, realize it was one of their kid's birthdays, and went around telling all their kids happy birthday. They didn't even remember my birthday.

Thinking about the hard times I had as a younger child, and comparing them to the hard times now, made me shed a few tears. I ran as fast as I could to the girls bathroom, bumping people as I go by but not having the time to apologize or say "Excuse me,". I locked myself up in the very back stall and leaned my head against the wall. I cried and I cried silently. I had no one in my life to comfort me. No one who cared. I'm on my own, but I still can't get used to it. Everyone is in class now and I'm still trying to build myself back up and get myself together. I knew I was going to be tardy, but I honestly don't care. There's already been plenty of other times I've been tardy for coming in this bathroom, crying my sorrows away.

All of a sudden, I heard footsteps. I stayed quiet for a second until I saw someone slip a note under my stall and walk off. I picked it up and opened it. The handwriting looked familiar, but I just couldn't identify it. It said,

'Dear Marissa, I know you're in a very hard time right now, and I just wanted to say I'm sorry. For everything. You're a strong girl and I know you can someway get through this. I know what I did tore you down, and you're trying to build yourself back up again. I know I still keep knocking you down, and once again, I'm sorry. I do care about you more than anything, so don't you dare keep thinking I don't. Maybe we can talk this through after school by your locker? Pass me this note back in Science if you want to. -Cameron'

Cameron. He actually sent me a note. He actually noticed me for once in 2 months. I don't know if I should meet him by my locker later. I'm quite scared, actually. I don't know if I can face him again, or even talk to him face to face again. One half of me says I need to get things off my chest and communicate, but the other half of me says I need to stay away and not face him. I'm gonna go with the first half.

I stuffed the note in my pocket and opened the stall door. By now, I don't have puffy red eyes so I think it's safe to go to Science.

I walked in and opened the door. On que, everyone turns around and glances at me, them turns back around and continues what they were doing before. Mr. Hackley looked up from his magazine and sat up.

"Miss. Dikes. You're late. Again." He says, his voice full of concern. "Sorry." Was all I said, before taking my usual seat beside Cameron. I immediately pulled out the note and slid it in front of him. He takes it and stuffs it in his pocket, giving me a quick nod. I put down my book on the desk and looked at the page number from Cameron's book. I then turned to the page and pretended to read like I usually do. This is usually the perfect time for me to think. But today I just don't feel like thinking. I feel like I've thought enough about this horrible situation I've been in for 2 months. I just sat there and blankly stared at the frog on the left side of the page.

After what seemed to be 5 minutes, Mr. Hackley spoke up.

"Alright, guys. That's enough reading for today. Now you guys are free to do what ever you like. We have about 10 minutes left of class." He announces. Me and Cameron shut our books at the same time and put them away.

Cameron looks over at me, trying to make contact, but I refuse at the moment.

"Marissa." I knew he'd say something. He can't ever look at someone for so long without saying something.

"What." I say back.

He waits a few seconds but only says two words that almost mean nothing to me. Two words that don't even phase me at all anymore.

"I'm sorry." He says before looking away.

"I'm done with the "sorry's"." I started. "I'm done with you trying to fix something with such little words! You don't mean anything you say, so why do you keep saying it?!" I snapped.

He sighed. "Because I do mean it, Marissa! You've been thinking so negative and now you won't believe anything anybody says to you anymore! You have to have trust in people!" He explains.

"How could I trust somebody who's broken my heart and tore me down so hard that I can't even pick myself up again?!" Silence.