They Call Me Silence

Silence is failing

A week later...

"How long are you going to keep this up?" Jackson asked beside me. We had just finished training and we decided to rest for a bit near a lake yards away from the pack house. It was calming and just the perfect place just to, talk.

I looked at Jackson with a confused expression, but I kind of knew what he was implying. "Keep what up?" I asked trying to fake knowledge.

He gave me a blank stare seeing right through me. "Avoiding Olive."

They've noticed, which isn't surprising because Alex noticed the minute I saw Olive, but he didn't say anything. I know I shouldn't avoid her but it's very difficult for me not to. She just can't go from being Olive to being Sophie. It's a huge leap I'm too scared to take.

"I found out something," I said out loud. It might be weird for them to understand why I suddenly started to avoid her but maybe if I tell Jackson then he could understand a little.

So I told him.

I told him everything that happened a week ago, every last detail. The fact that Olive is adopted and that she was actually the long lost sister I thought was dead. And how my father was here and the deal he made with Alex's dad. Everything.

"I just can't go up to Olive and not see Sophie. I couldn't protect her the first time, I left her. I didn't even try to fight for her, I just ran. I can't let her down again. Maybe I'm doing the right thing here, avoiding her before things get too deep and I fail her all over again."

I let out a long sigh, "What do you think Jackson?" I faced him to see that he was watching the lake with a blank stare. He was listening to the story the whole time and stayed like this, letting me finish smoothly. I bet he was shocked to be thrown all this at once, I felt a little bad but I needed another opinion.

"Aren't you failing her already?"

"What?"

He turned to me with narrowed eyes. "You're failing her Rose. If anything you should take this opportunity to take your sister back, yet you're not. You're not scared to fail her again, you're scared about the future and what will happen if Olive were to come back into your life. Another weakness will only slow you down, right?"

"Jackson wha--"

"When Sophie 'died' you didn't train. You had depression and my mother had to help you out of it. Sophie was your weakness and it took you years to finally become better. Then you were stuck with me, another weakness. The only reason you keep me safe is so you can repay my mother, not because you actually care about me. And if you did end up failing you would only feel bad because you failed my mother. You always say fail, you failed Sophie, you don't want to fail Maria. But do you ever feel? Do you ever think 'I don't want to lose them because I love them'?"

I stared at Jackson. He has never done or said anything like this before. Has he always felt this way? Why hasn't he ever said anything? "Jackson I--"

"Leave it," he got up cleaning off his jeans, "Olive is waiting for me at the house. I'll see you there," he started to walk away but stopped and turned back around, "Hopefully you figure out what to do."

Jackson walked all the way to the pack house while I stayed on my spot thinking about what he said. Have I always said those things? Have I ever told Jackson that I love him? Have I ever told Sophie that I loved her before everything happened?

Is it true? I just do all of this because I don't want to fail people?

But I love Sophie and Jackson, I love them both with all my heart and I never wish any harm to happen to them. Because I love them. I have to tell them I love them.

Without letting another second pass I get up ready to run to the pack house but something stops me. A sharp pain in the side of my neck. "Ack! W-who--"

"Your father is going to be so happy to see you, darling," A faint whisper said next to my ear. And I never felt so weak.

I heard something approaching and my lazy eyes caught a glimpse of a dark figure staring down at me. "It's her."

The person drew their arm back and punched me in the face successfully knocking me out.

___

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