Thick Smoke

Cold

Eliza woke up in the Hospital Wing in Hogwarts. She could remember everything clearly except the person who attacked her in the end.

Her body was regaining strength well, especially after a day of long dreamless sleep but her heart cringed. She didn't want to show her weak side to anyone so she held a poker face for the remaining days in Hogwarts.

She wasn't the only one hurt. Hermione and Ron had to be kept for more days as well. Friends came around and gave sweets to Eliza, Seamus even spent half a day telling her about this girl he had a crush on while Dean filled the rest of the day telling her about football championships.

Harry was coming every day and though he tried to speak to her, she ignored him. Luna, Ginny and Neville came pretty often as well and would spend almost the whole day, especially since Hermione's and Ron's beds were across Eliza's.

Reading the newspaper was not helping Eliza either. She listened but not once looked up. Furvus was glued to her side and not once left.

"That's one loyal pet right there." Ron mumbled, watching Furvus guard his owner. "And those green eyes...I guess that's how Eliza's animagus would look?"

Neville glanced at the kitten too and felt a shiver down his spine, "I guess he does seem human sometimes."

It was quite lively and everyone knew Harry was not a crazy lunatic spreading out lies. For the moment, it was peace. It was sickening.

"Hey, Liz?"

Eliza didn't have to look up to know who came to her.

"I just- I- I'm sorry. It's all my fault and-"

"It is." She interrupted, "It's all your fault." Eliza continued coldly.

Harry's been apologizing for the past three days and no matter how pitiful he looked doing that, Eliza's heart closed completely. Nothing could get past it.

Next day everyone was allowed to leave and Eliza decided to go around, have a walk. She met Peeves but he acted like he didn't see her. She heard paintings hush between themselves but she ignored them.

Somehow, she ended up in the dungeons. Her legs led her in front of Snape's office but she wasn't sure she wanted to see the happy face of someone who loathed her father. Instead, she turned around and continued to roam around.

It was already night when she found herself in front of Snape's office once more. This time, she knocked but no one responded so she invited herself in.

Willy was there as always. He opened his eyes when she entered and waved his wings in greeting. Eliza walked to him and for the first time, patted him softly. He didn't resist at all as if he knew she's in pain.

She thought Snape would return soon but he didn't. In the end, she sat down under the window sill and pulled her legs in front of her chest, holding them tightly. It was silent and lonely and Eliza could still hear Sirius' loud laughter echoing in Grimmauld Place.

Was that how he felt when Ophelia died? Was that how he felt when Regulus died? Eliza was sure he didn't dwell on it much since it was war back then. But then, the second war was just around the corner and Voldemort wasn't going to die out of nowhere.

What about her then? She had no family left and her only hope at a bright future was fading slowly. No, there's Remus, a voice inside her head said. But Remus is not Sirius.

Yes...no one could replace Sirius. These thoughts were so heartbreaking that she started to cry. She spent a few hours standing there, crying.

Her eyes have lost that youthful glint and the color of her iris darkened considerably. Eliza was empty and she looked drained out of emotions and life. She was standing on her bed all alone, staring ahead at an empty wall with nothing; no regret, no sorrow, no guilt and no expectation whatsoever.