*This story takes place in between chapter five during the gaps that were not fully explained in the chapter.
Chapter Five:
Johnny handed me the copy of Gone With The Wind back. He had been looking over it trying to entertain himself. I could tell we couldn't really get it based in the hard expression he wore. The creases on his face dug in sculpting it into that of a young man. In this state he actually looked his age. With dark big black eyes and that floppy hair over a chiseled structure. I caught myself staring at him and when he looked up he asked me softly,
"Ponyboy, do you think I could ever be like these guys? Ya know, brave and heroic?"
That question strikes me as odd. I always thought that of Johnny as mine, well more like ours. Not a hero out saving people. But I suppose even with everything he's been through, he was probably still the most moral of all of us. He was kind and loving, he followed rules and always felt guilty when we would do something bad. That's what we loved about him I guess.
"Well," I thought for a minute.
"If you really tried, I think you could be anything."
I was thinking about other things to say.
"You know Johnny, I think you could be better than a them."
He looked at me real strange for a minute then looked back down at the cover of the book.
"Are you a bit hungry Pony?"
"I could really go for a sandwich right about now." He finished.
I was pretty hungry too. He had put our food in a plastic bag from the store. He pulled out some bread and a piece of bologna. He put it together and handed me the sandwich. I hate baloney, but I didn't really want to tell him that. I took a bite of the sandwich. I ate the rest as quickly as I could trying not to taste the salty lunch meat. Johnny ate his slowly though, chewing every bite. I watched as his mouth moved up and down, making the curve of his jaw appear stronger and wider. I watched the rhythmic movement of his motions. He swallowed his food and looked up at me.
"Boy Pony, you sure have been staring a lot today. Did that Soc hit you on the head?"
He was joking but I could feel my ears and face getting hotter.
"I was just joking around Pony." He let out a little laugh.
I sat back down and relaxed my head against the cold marble floor. I stared up at the condemned ceiling. How did I get here? I asked myself. Just the other day I was hanging' around in the empty lot. Now I'm a fugitive. I let out a long breath and saw Johnny scoot over towards me. He laid down mimicking my motions and staring up at the ceiling too.
"Do you think Dally will really come back to help us?" He asked.
It was a good question. Dally had helped us, but this problem was big.
"Boy I hope so, but I just don't want him caught up in this, ya dig?"
Johnny nodded his head then rolled over and closed his eyes. I stayed awake wonderin about how we were gonna get outta here. I remember what Dally had said,
"'I thought New York was the only place I could get mixed up in this Murder Crap.'" (Hinton 61)
I sighed and put my hands over my face trying to rub out the tiredness. I rolled over and faced Johnny. It looked like he was sleeping already.
"Johnny?" he didn't respond. With just the sound of his breathing it was awful quiet, and cold. I took off my jacket to earlier in the day, I got up to get it but even with it it was still cold. I layed back down and put my back up to Johny's. I let myself forget about all that had happened and drifted off into a deep sleep.
I woke up a few hours later, the sun was starting to set as a fire engine blared off in the distance. I got up off the floor and turned over to see Johnny still asleep. He looked so peaceful, kind of like a regular teenage boy, but then I remembered where we were.
I walked out the door of the back of the church. It was pretty chilly out. The sun was starting to set and it reflected beautiful rays of pink and lavender light down upon the church. I remember what Cherry had said to me about them.
"'She kind of shrugged. "I could just tell. I'll bet you watch sunsets, too.'" (Hinton 35)
That seemed so long ago. Sitting at the movies with Johnny, Cherry and Marcia. I wonder if she was watching the sunset too. I closed my eyes breathing in the country air. I was so focused on the view I didn't see Johnny come out and stand right next to me.
It startled me a little. After all, it had been less that twenty-four hours since we got jumped.
"Boy Pony, you really do like sunsets." said Johnny.
We took a minute to relax and take it in.
"Listen Pony, I'm sorry. For dragging you into this," He paused for a minute, the continued.
"I'm sorry that you're on the run now too. I didn't want that to happen. I shouldn't have done that." He looked down disappointed
This sunset is almost as beautiful as you Johnny. I thought to myself, I wanted to say it, but it didn't seem right.
"Hey don't beat yourself up about it. I could have stayed back if I wanted, but you saved my life, and that's something I'll never be able to pay back.
He looked right at me as tears started to well in his eyes.
"Thank you." He said
A single tear rolled down his cheek. He leaned in towards me slowly getting closer. He stopped inches from my face. Then he pulled me into a tight hug. I wrapped my arms right back around him.
When he looked back at me as we pulled apart the tears were streaming faster. But it was something I'd never seen on his face before. It was happiness and gratitude.
I stared right into his eyes. This time though, instead of a hug, we leaned in and kissed. The tears on his face tasted salty as his lips danced over mine. It was quick, but when we pulled away his face flushed. As he turned his head away from mine I saw a small grin stretch across his face.
We stood there a bit longer until the sun went down, and even after he had gone back in I stood there, butterflies hitting my chest, it felt great, and it felt new, it felt like love.
* * *
When I woke up the next morning Johnny was up and making sandwiches again. I looked at them with disgust. I gladly took on though. When I grabbed it Johnny and my hand touched. We locked eyes for a moment then he blushed and looked back down at his food.
My cheeks felt hot. I turned away trying to compose myself.
"Pony, are we gonna talk?" Johnny asked me timidly.
"Sure." I knew what he would say, we made a mistake.
"I... I l-liked it." He looked away embarrassed.
I just sat there awestruck. That's the last thing I thought he would say.
All I could get out was "M-me too!"
He looked back at me with relief. I guess we both were thinking the same thing. Boy, what would people think? I asked myself.
"You know Pony... we could run away. From all this, just you and me, I could finally get away, so could you." He told me.
Man, that sounded real good. Nothing to worry about, not problems, just the two of us. I thought about it, a smile creeping up my face. Then I stopped, what about Darry, and Soda, and school. I was a good student. I was real smart, and don't want to throw that away, after all "I got put up a year in grade school.'" (Hinton 21) I didn't just want to leave my family either, them and the gang had been through enough.
I looked at Johnny apologetically. "I'm sorry Johnnycake, but I can't, I have to stay."
He didn't look angry when I said it. Just... sad. He looked away from me, out towards the winding pews.
"I know, you got everything back home, I get it."
I felt real bad. I couldn't meet his eyes, I know he really wanted it.
"Dally should be here soon anyway, we can't just disappear." I told him.
"Yeah." He agreed with despondency.
* * *
Not even four hours later as Johnny and I were leaning up against the pews reading Gone With The Wind Dally came bursting through the doors.
"Hey there guys!" He shouted down to us.
It startled us and we both jumped up.
"Don't do that Dally!" Johnny exclaimed.
"Sorry kid, it's just good to see ya'" He eyed us both up.
"So," he started "What you been up to."
We both looked at eachother then flushed.
"N-nothing, just reading." I stammered out.
Luckily Dally didn't catch it. He was too busy looking around the church.
""Do y'all want somethin' to eat or not?"" (Hinton 72)
"Yeah of course!" Said Johnny.
It sure had been awhile since we'd eaten. Dally stepped out to let us pack up our stuff.
"So, I guess after this, I'll either go to jail, or something like that."
"I hope not Johnny, I don't want you to go. I-I love you, and your the best friend I've ever had, and I wish it didn't have to be this way, I really don't b-but!..." I choked on my words.
Johnny just looked away.
He said softly. "Me too." And headed to the door wiping a tear from his face.
I stood in the church for a minute, admiring the structure that kept us safe and hidden these few days. All the memories it held, ones Johnny and I shared, and the ones we didn't. All of our secrets, and people's wishes and desires from years past. It made me sad, not because it was abandoned, but because after this, when I stepped out of the church, it would be the last thing that truly knew of our secret love.
"Are you coming?!" Dalley yelled in.
"Yeah!" I shouted back.
As I stepped towards the door I took one more look, a smile flickered on my face, It had been nice here. I closed the door on the old edifice, along with our endearment and secrets not looking back as I headed down the hill where Johnny and Dally awaited with warm smiles.
The End
