The HILARIOUS adventures of Dash and Jim! Jim's POV! (P.S, we're chicks)
Episode 1
I heard Dash give a weird half scream half laugh as we ran from the soliders like chickens with our heads cut off. The soliders were wearing dirty camo uniforms and obviously had no training with a gun. I mean, they were missing by a mile everytime, literally.
I was brought back to the present when I heard Dash scream, "THEY ARE GOING TO KILL USSS!" she wailed while waving her hands over her head like a spaz. She was NUTS, but I couldn't talk. We were running as fast as we could. I could no longer see my feet encased in my most loved black and grey skate shoes with the red rose-and-thorn pattern on the front. My long red hair was whipping around my face, and I despised my choice to leave it out today. Suddently I was whacked hard in the face by a tree branch. I shreiked at the unexpected blow and heard Dash quickly laugh like a maniac, grrr.
I huffed, frusterated and growled angryly at Dash, "Oh, HAR HAR. God Dash, even when we are being chased by total retards who have no sense of aim, YOU STILL FIND SOMETHING TO LAUGH AT!" I huffed again as she muttered, obviously thinking that it was to herself "And you still find something to bash your head on..." while laughing mockingly, I groaned she could be sooo annoying sometimes, but again, who am I to say anything.
But I still couldn't stop myself from laughing along with her. After all the sticky situations that we'd gotten ourselves into, this was by far one of the worst, and funniest.
My laughter halted as a bullet collided with dash's calf, causing her to shriek in pain.
Of all the times for the dude to get a fluke.
~~~
Being chased by soliders with no aim was hillarias but being tyed to a stake with flame beneath you had me in freakin' stitches. But I was PISSED OFF too, I was getting burn marks on my FAVOURITE SHOES! Well, atleast the soliders were entertained. Dash and I reached around and high fived eachother. "EAT THIS SOLIDER PEOPLE!" I screamed at them before spitting in one of their faces.
Then we started to ninja our way out of the ropes. My obviously supperior skills allowed me to get bothmy legs out while Dash only got one leg out. Or maybe she just wasn't trying hard. The uniformed idiots came at us to try and retie us, but their was no use, we couldn't die anyway. Mouahahaaa!!
I decided to kick a few of their faces so they could get the hell away from my precious shoes (they just ended up closer to my shoes), I broke the first dude's jaw and the next ones nose. Isn't it funny when they start spurting blood like a metre out? Just like one of those really bad horror movies! -_-
Dash snorted loudly and spat in the first dudes face. He went to act tough and wipe it away, conveniently forgeting about his broken jaw. The idiot growled from the pain, ahh, revenge is sooo sweet. That's for tieing us up bitchessss!!!
His angry and tortured expression was so comical that Dash and I ROFLed soooooooo hard."Talk about eating Jim, Donut King 3:00!" Yelled Dash causing me to look in the direction that she was pointing and cracked up. There was an oblivious Homer Simpson look-a-like stuffing his face. We continued to laugh as we escaped.
~~~
Episode 2
Dash and I creeped through the lasers field, light on our feet. The smoke-bomb-watsamajig had revealed where the damn things were. I felt like making a bit of a fool of myself and did a plié under one, making Dash laugh. But then I started to laugh along with her when did the splits under the same one.
Nothing beats Lycra when it comes to this kind of work! (GO SPANDEX!)
During the rest of our 'circus act' through the lasers I started to quietly hum Mission Impossible. After we finally made it through, we stood infront of a mahogany pedestal. It was decorated heavily in beautiful carvings of flowers and vines.
Sat atop the large pedestal was a glass box containing a red velvet cushion. Resting onto of that was the most expensive, beautiful piece of jewellry ever made. My eyes slid down from the exqisite piece to the gold plaque proffessionally screwed underneath. It read:
"Made with the ulitimate metal, compressed carbon (Diamond), Emerald, Sapphire and Ruby. The most heavy and expensive wearable piece of art is placed in this cabinet."
It was taunting us, daring us to take it.
It was sooo perdy!
Dash and I skipped up to it and, aware of the non-existence of further obstacles, she pulled out another smoke-bomb-thing. Nothing, zilch, the case itself was utterly unprotected! Not that I saw anything wrong with that. But still, I thought back to the guards we had knocked out and the cameras which practically had a big red button saying 'TURN ME OFF'. Man, you'd think security would be better at a place like this, I expected more of a challenge.
I was on a sort of gold-high as I called it when Dash and I reached forward. "Steal, steal, steal!" I sung as I ran up to the overly bejeweled necklace.
Dash was right behind me, hypnotized by it's beauty, murmuring "Shinyyy."
OK, so here's the deal, my BFF Koolkatkake and I randomly made up Dash and Jim in a particularly bludge-able Graphics class. And we decided to put it on wattpad for a laugh, basically everything that happens is the same, but by different POV's. Hopefully, there will be more Dash and Jim to come, so if you like them, comment and vote, please...?
YOU ARE READING
