The whispers came first. I told a girl I liked her, I had meant it in a friendly way. I'd always told everyone that I liked them. She exclaimed, "Eww, that's gross!" and moved further away. That was my first mistake.
The writing on the walls came second. "Sam loves x" "Sam wears diapers" The worst was when someone wrote something nasty about me on a chair and the teacher thought it was me, so I had to clean it.
The game came third. They called it "The Sam Touch". Most everyone avoided me like the plague. If they touched me, they could get it. That might've been the worst part, the avoidance, the refusal to talk to me.
Sometimes, I think back to that 3rd grader. Dreading the thought of school, of comments when I was running, of seeing myself cry everyday.
Sometimes, I think back to that 4th grader. Already wanting to die, the lump in my throat when I approached that classroom, and desperately wishing for a way out.
Sometimes, I think back to that 5th grader. Getting in yelling matches everyday, trying my best, and struggling to keep my head up.
Sometimes, I think of myself now. Loving myself, loving people, and spending hours on video games. I am more than what they made of me, and I'm proud. So, suck it, childhood bullies.
