I want to drain a river of blood from my body
I'll set sail in search of hope, self pity can't be my only hobbie
Sanity fades behind me as I continue down the stream
I set shore by the mountain of regret, the harsh sun sends heat like a lazer beam
I wipe away the tears of yesterday
The salty taste reminds me that I'm home and that she's so far away
I walk into the forest of laughter were I am greeted by my demons
They asked me "why do you still love her"? I sat down and i gave them a list of reasons
They took it as a joke and gave me directions
I ended up in memory lane, it had many twists and turns and distorted intersections
In the distance i see that the memories of her are still there, I visit them everyday
I make the trip yet again, I'll see the hope when I'm here but it'll never stay
I pass by my old bullies, I pass by my old friends
I pass by the young loner fantasizing about his end
I pass by my transparent family, I pass by my worst fears
I leave behind a trail of broken words and tears
I wiped my shoes on the floor mat as I unlocked the door
I shut the door and drop my keys when I see who I was looking for
There she was waiting for me with open arms
Her arms have healed from the times she had self harmed
Long hair flowing
Her eyes are glowing
God I love her so much
When I hugged her she instantly turns to dust
I'm on my knees
Tears on my cheeks
The walls peel away, and I was forced to relive that day
I can hear the laughter from behind the wall
I looked to see the devil standing tall
He took a knee to talk me, to tell me "you're a failure, forever a stranger, she forgot about you"
My past is behind him cheering and chanting "it is true"
I stand with blacked out eyes and praying that they're wrong
I life had changed when I knew her, I finally found a home
Her soft pink lips, her curvy hips and her colorful mind
Together we found the hope we desperately need find
We set each other on a road to happiness and success
With her beside me we never felt depressed
Months gone by
I still say why
I wish I can still make memories with her
I'm sorry I've been an annoyance like a small splinter
I still think about times were we'll talk and literal days will go by
The times we would stall because we didn't want to say goodbye
I'm sorry that you didn't feel loved by me
I tried my best, I miss you, you were the greatest part of me
Other peoples lies have ruined my life
I thought my word was enough, I still wish you were my wife
I want to end the pain from all the things that went wrong
I'll always be here , but I don't know for how long
I lost hope
My exit strategy involves a rope
If I die
I think you'll know why
I love you, soon I'll say goodbye
