I grew up under my grandmother's gaze, and she aged under mine. The wrinkles around her eyes deepened every day, so did the lines along her forehead.
But even when the blistering heat of the summer sun stared her down, she always did what she had to do to put food on our table, to put clothes over my skin.
I met Lee Jeno that summer. As I took the subway home that colourful afternoon, I sat across from a boy, hair the shade of caramel and eyes dark yet warm and soft like sunrise.
I remember that moment I thought – if only I were prettier today.
But none of it mattered. I didn't have time for beautiful boys and long walks at the beach. I had my grandmother to care for.
So I got down at my stop without uttering a single word, while he remained at his seat and travels further and further away until I couldn't see him anymore.
And I left.
"Bora," my grandmother called. I was sitting in the house, the fan on to cool me off from the heat of the long day. "Would you come here for a second?"
I stood up and tied my hair in a knot. "Coming."
I entered our small kitchen as grandma prepared dinner.
"Ah, we're out of eggs," she said.
"I'll grab some."
Grandma smiled. "Don't take too long, I need them for dinner."
"I won't."
I took my bike and rode to the nearest store, only a few minutes away.
The sky was darkening and the blue sky had transitioned into shades of pink and orange – sunsets never fail to amaze me, no matter how many times I watch it.
I parked my bike in front of the store, the harsh white light penetrating the windows of the store. A bell sounded as I opened the door and made my way to find the eggs.
The smashing of the eggs happened faster than the time it took for me to find ones cheap enough, them being the last ones. Frustration washed over my face as I looked up to see the person who had carelessly walked right into me.
To my surprise – and your expectation – the person who stood in front of me was the same boy I admired in the subway. His hair was tousled as if he had been running his hand through it way too often, and he had changed into a white t-shirt which was now more yellow than white from the yolk of my broken eggs.
I was about to lash out at him when he broke into profuse apologies.
"I'm so sorry, are you okay?" he said, his brows furrowed in a concerned gaze. "I'll pay you back, I swear. I'm so sorry."
My balled fist relaxed as he apologized.
It's kinda cute.
I let out a sigh.
"Uh, it's alright."
I picked up the open box of broken eggs to throw them away. The boy in front of me crouched down to help.
"You really don't have to." I smiled a little uncomfortably. We were way too close.
Then his eyes met mine.
And he smiled.
It was a genuine smile – wrinkles formed around his eyes and it was as if his eyes were smiling too as they squinted. I immediately looked back down at the mess we had made.
"I really am sorry," he repeated.
"It's okay," I said, but it sounded like barely a whisper.
I felt him smile again.
We cleaned up our mess and I dashed out as soon as we stood up, but not without paying for the broken eggs. As I prepared to leave, I saw him run towards the door and towards me. He had a plastic bag in hand.
"Here." he extended it out to me. When I refused, he placed it in my bike's basket.
"Thank you," I whispered again, looking down at my feet now at the pedals of my bike, ready to leave.
"Well, maybe I'll see you around," he said as he looked up at the darkening sky.
Maybe.
"Hey! I'm Lee Jeno, what's your name?" he shouted just as I left the parking lot.
I looked back at him. "Eun Bora."
And with that I left.
