After the Ashes - Story from Gale Hawthorne

Chapter 4

I read until Katniss comes back with a huge glass of water, which didn't leave me much time at all with reading.

"Thanks," I say and take a few gulps of water. I didn't realize how thirsty I really was. I drank about half the cup within 30 seconds and Katniss looks at my shocked.

"Damn Gale. . .that glass is huge I thought it'd hold you for awhile but I guess not," Katniss says with surprise.

I wanted to ask when she was leaving without being rude. It's not that I wanted her gone so badly, but Peeta. . .

Suddenly there is a knock on the door. "Come in," I say automatically. The element of surprise smacks me across the face. It's Peeta.

"Katniss there you are I had no idea where you went I was so worried," he rambles and darts to her.

"I'm sorry Peeta there was just something on my mind I had to take care of," Katniss says without emotion. And then simultaneously they look at me. I back into the wall that my bed rests against, feeling pressured and unsure why. They look back at each other, and in Peeta's reaction I could tell he thought what Katniss first thought - I look like hell. My skin pale, unshaven face, tired eyes, and jittery fingers.

Peeta looks more concerned than mad. I suddenly have to pee really bad after chugging that water, so I get up and walk to the bathroom.

After relieving my bladder, I stare at my scarred reflection. A mix of strength and weakness show. A confusing mess. I turn around and tug off my shirt, concentrating on my whipping lashes. I try counting them.

I whisper out loud as I count, "One. . .Two. . .Three. . .Four. . ."

"Five. . .Six. . .Seven. . .Eight. . ."

After around fifteen, I lose my place. Then someone knocks. I don't respond. I restart my counting.

"One. . .two. . .three. . ."

"Gale? Are you okay it's been almost twenty minutes," I hear Katniss on the other side of the door. I ignore her and continue.

"Four. . .five. . .six. . ."

And then she opens the door. I scramble to find my shirt and throw it back on embarrassed.

She looks at me with sad eyes, holding the doorknob. I back into a corner, feeling pressured by her stare. She's coming for me, to throw away the broken remains of my already shattered heart, I tell myself.

She walks toward me slowly, swiftly, until she is only feet from me. I try to back farther into the corner, as if I could dissolve into the walls if I tried hard enough. I tremble, not listening to my brain but instead to my heart. She's coming to rip me out, to feed me to the monster inside us all, my heart tells me, as if it has a voice of its own.

Katniss corners me, only inches away. She looks up into my eyes calmly, searching for something. I bite my lip wanting to disappear. My fingers shake wildly and I gulp, thinking she is going to hurt me.

And then she kisses me.

I am swirling in love, hate, confusion, and anything in between. I jerk my head away, smacking it against the wall.

"Ouch," I manage to spit out. I close my eyes suddenly dizzy. The room turns upside down and I fall to the ceiling. Katniss stands, looking to me. Her arms raise to reveal blue-gray wings. And then her whole human body transforms into a mockingjay. She flies, soars, out of the window to the heights of the sky, to the clouds. The ceiling falls through and everything goes dark. I am unconscious.

                       *************

I wake up back in my bed. No one is in my room, inhabiting my privacy. I find the book I started from the nightstand drawer. I pick up from page two and read.

At chapter 4, Katniss knocks. I shove the book back in the drawer as she walks in. "How do you feel?" Katniss says sympathetically, as if I was sick. Maybe I am. Last time I remember, I was in the bathroom. And then I remember - she kissed me.

"I'm fine," I mumble, looking away from her. She nods and sits at the foot of my bed.

"Peeta went back home," she adds, not that I really care. "He understands why I'm here."

I don't even understand why she is here. And that's what I say next.

"Why are you here?" I ask without a harsh tone, but instead curiosity.

"I-I...." she grasps for the right words. "I need to make sure you are okay."

"Well you see I am. And my family can do that, just down the hall," I reply, implying her answer was not enough.

"I need to make sure you are okay for myself. You haven't been exactly stable," she says in obliviously way, because she doesn't understand my pain. She won't. Lucky her.