Random Stories

I'm (Not) Fine

"Miss Cook, it is time for you to take your medicine," the soft spoken nurse told me.

I nodded and looked up at the harsh white ceiling. I was in a hospital, but why? I've been here for two? three weeks? Time seemed to blur together, my mind was foggy and sluggish from all of the pain meds they pumped into me. I hated the medicine they gave me, four pills twice a day with food.  The hospital food was bland and textureless, unlike the homemade food I was used to. Why was I used to homemade food, I tried to remember, but I couldn't come up with any explanation.

"How are you today?" she asked.

"I'm fine," I replied quietly.

I shakily tried to cut the meat with the fork, but I wasn't strong enough to. The nurse cut it up for me and feed me each bite, it was humiliating for me. I had only eaten the minimal amount of food required to take the medicine before refusing to eat anymore.

I stared at a vase of flowers placed at my bedside, one of the nurses gave them to me. They whispered behind my back, but I only caught snippets of a crash and a death. No one I remember knowing visited me, why didn't they? Did I do something wrong?

My world slowly faded into darkness as I went back under the influence of whatever drugs they put me on. When I woke up there was someone right next to me. Their face was somewhat blurry and I tried to blink my eyes to clear up the image. The face got somewhat in focus, but I couldn't tell who it was.

"You should eat more," she said softly.

I finally recognized who it was, it was my older sister. She was nice, always took care of me when our parents died, it was nice knowing that someone was there.

"Why didn't you visit me earlier Morgan?" I asked, pouting.

She smiled, "I've visited you before Alice, it's just that you don't remember, you silly goose."

I closed my eyes again, but I felt something press against my lips. I opened my mouth and the bland taste of the hospital food reached my taste buds. I swallowed it reluctantly only to find another bite being forced into my mouth.

"If you eat you'll get better faster, do it for me," she chided.

I nodded and let her continue to spoon feed me, something wasn't right though. A voice in the back of my head telling me that this wasn't real. She stopped feeding me and the taste of something metallic and salty entered my mouth. I couldn't see Morgan's face, but I saw her begin to walk away.

"Don't leave me, I need you," I whimpered, trying to get out of the bed.

When I swung my legs over the side of the bed I fell considerably, something was wrong. I looked down, both of my legs were missing from the knee down. This couldn't be happening, I still felt a dull pain where they should be. I screamed and looked to where Morgan was, she was blurry, I couldn't see her face.

It hit me, the car crash, Morgan was driving when a truck sped down the wrong side of the road. She swerved so that her side took the brunt of the impact. The car crumbled like an aluminum can and all I remembered were her screams and a searing pain in my legs. I couldn't remember what she looked like, why couldn't I?

The metallic liquid flooded my mouth and I started coughing up crimson globs of blood. It hurt, but I had to find her, nurses and a couple of doctors rushed into my room only to find me coughing up blood as I dragged myself across the floor towards the exit.

"I have to find her," I said weakly.

"C'mon sweetie, let's get you back into your bed," a nurse said.

I tried to fight back as they put me back into the bed, I started screaming and kicking with what remained of my legs.

"I need to see Morgan!" I cried out in desperation.

"I'm sorry Miss Cook, your sister died in impact. We declared her dead at the scene," one of the doctors said.

She...really was dead, I stopped screaming and a nurse took a piece of gauze and wiped the corners of my mouth where the blood was still there. I didn't know what to do, I had no family outside of Morgan and the few friends I had weren't that close.

I closed my eyes, what was the point of living anymore. I felt more blood come up my throat, I didn't care. I started to drift off into unconsciousness, blood trickling.  out of my mouth. I heard the warped sound of beeping and people shouting before I drifted, one last time, into darkness.

I didn't know what to expect, but I felt a hand cup my cheek. I opened my eyes and saw my parents standing in front of our house while Morgan stood in front of me. I couldn't see their faces, just a blur.

"There are people that care for you back there, you may not remember this, but we will always watch over you. Live on for us, Alice," she said before kissing my forhead.

"How are you feeling Alice?" someone asked.

I opened my eyes, why was I here? I didn't want to be here. I could've been with my family. There was no point in living a life without them, but I would. As much as I despise living, I'll live on for them.

"Alice?" she asked again, uncertainty lining her voice.

"I'm fine," I said, not even looking at her.

I had to be, I needed to be strong for them. I needed to not let this affect me. I couldn't let anything like this happen again.

"Alice, you don't have to isolate yourself."

I looked at her, it was Clair, one of my friends. We were never really close though, I wonder why she cared.

"Please, tell me how your actually feeling," Clair pleaded.

"I'm," I paused, getting ready to say not. I never did though, "fine."

"I'm...fine" I said again, even smiling.

I barely registered her wrapping her arms around me. I felt something run down my cheeks, tears, I thought.

"I'll be here for you, that's what friends are for," she whispered.

I nodded, "I'm fine," I said, but I lied.

I'm not fine.