Have you ever been so worried in your life ? Well let me reword that. Has something before happen and ever since that, you can't help but think about it happening again ? It's like getting traumatized, but little less bad. I once in my life had something happen before. I just keep worrying about it happening again. It's scary to think about it. I can't sleep. I can't be happy. I can't ignore it. I just worry a lot about it , and I start doubting everything . I get those "what if" statements. Those statement end up creating a whole new idea which causes more conflicts. I'm pretty sure a lot can relate but what if it was so long ago , and it's coming back. You must think that I'm making myself think these things. But am I ? What if they just came to mind on all of sudden ? Your thinking just about things , maybe even about food and it's just pops up in your head. Well there again is a another what if statement. You see what I mean ? This thing that I'm so worried about is tearing me apart. Recreating the bad things in my mind. Getting me angry , making me think if this never happened then how would it end ? Or how would everything begin again ? They say talking about it "is a relief" but it's really not. You just end thinking about it again, maybe sometimes letting it out helps but is it really ? It's still stuck in your head. It's still a part of you. It's also like when people say that quote "forgiven not forgotten". We can't really forget about how we felt during that moment , or the things that were going on. They say the best we can do is "move on" but I believe no one actually "moves on". It's called pretending. A lot of people do it , when it comes to sadness and happiness. It's horrifying to think that maybe everyone is pretending. Everyone says that people aren't perfect and that something is always wrong. But I guess this where I go when I worry.
