Reflection

Life Is A Delicate Thing

    Again with the same old things, today was a day like any other. So far at least. I was in the car, staring off into space, while looking through the back seat windows and listening to music. Normal 14 year old stuff. Luka had stayed at home while I went with my parents. I’m not quite sure where we were headed, perhaps groceries shopping. But that doesn’t matter now. God I wish I could take a moment to appreciate the life I had, at least in that split second. But before I knew it, everything was taken away from me.
    Fresh rotting carcusses mixed with blood to form a disgusting vulgar smell within the air. The sight of horror bestood itself upon me in the form of my worst nightmares. There was my parents, covered in blood, crushed by the front of a car. The sight was tear jerking, and left my knees weak till I fell to the ground, vomiting up all that remained in my stomach. Oh god….why….why…?! Why did this happen to us?! Why would God be so cruel?! Why did they have to leave me….? Why couldn’t I at least say goodbye…? All I could think was “why”. But why it happened doesn’t matter, it happened, and all that is left is to accept that. But I couldn’t. I didn’t feel real. It was far worse than any nightmare.
    “Mama….papa….!” I cried till my tiny screeching voice turned hoarse. In my suffering I crawled to their lifeless bodies and cried, desperately trying to wake up their eternally resting bodies. It was obviously no use….they were dead, and I was alone.The whole world was empty, vague of any sense to it. Nothing mattered in that moment. Everything around me was a shadow of what might of existed, everyone was a faceless blur, just another entity doing it’s programmed task.
    Cuts are sliced deep inside me both emotionally and physically. I had gashes from glass covering my body like a blanket of pain, but nothing could compare to the pain inside me, causing me to wail out in sorrow. The imagine burned into my eyes, forever leaving its mark in my mind, an image to see every time I close my eyes. Their haunting lifeless eyes soon became my own eyes. Their gaze pierced me with, as if mocking me for being so useless.
   
Sometimes I wish I was killed instead, or at least with them.

    Luka truly was the only one I felt safe with after that. I could only rely on her, and her only. I refused to open up to anyone. Not even aunt Meiko and uncle Kaito, who took us in afterwards. Without Luka I would be in true solitude, lost in my own misery. When she moved out a couple years ago, I refused to stay when she wasn’t there, and so I moved in with Luka. Of course I was required to get a job and help pay for things, but it was worth it. And so me and Luka worked our asses off together to pay for it all. Though I recently got fired for my job, since I wasn’t very good with customers.
    No matter how hard it got, me and Luka stayed together. Nothing could separate us. Just the thought of losing her too could send me to the brink of tears. So I prefer not to think about it. But I can’t help but worry. You never know when death’s around the corner. You can lose everything you love within a second with no warning. Just like that night….

    “Luki….”
A soft voice enters my thoughts. Mikuo, it is Mikuo’s calm and soothing voice. My childhood friend, and my first crush before the incident.
“Luki.” The voice grows louder, echoing in my thoughts.
“Luki!!!”  I suddenly glance rapidly around me, being forced out trance.
    “Huh…? What is it….?” I lazily ask, sounding tired even though I’m more still adjusting to the real world than anything.
    “Were you day-dreaming again Lu-kun?” Mikuo asks a bit impatient. Cute. My eyes scan the room, processing it all. From this I realize that Miku and Luka are in another room talking. It’s just me and Mikuo now.
    “I was thinking.” I bluntly state.
    “Figures. You’re always in your own world.” He sighs before continuing,“Good thing I realized before I started really talking.” Mikuo plops back onto the couch right next to me. “By the way Lu-kun, why do you never talk to me in school? You talk to Meito more than me, and he’s been graduated for a couple of years now!” Mikuo pouts, and I only have one thing to say.
    “Correction. Meito talks to me.”
    “Same thing! I miss you, ya know.” His voice goes down a little on that part. I’m a bit shocked he honestly wants to talk to me again. I thought he’d lost interest in me, like anyone would. Like everyone has. After I stopped talking to people, no one even bothers to look me in the eye. Maybe I just look intimidating. Or perhaps it’s because I’m too blunt and end up hurting people’s feelings. But why doesn’t really matter. People avoid me and I couldn’t care less.
    “I prefer to keep to myself. Unlike you I can’t talk every second of the day.” It’s true, he does. If he’s not talking to someone, he’s texting someone in class, not listening, forgetting everything said within the entire period. His grades must reflect it, and probably unlike him I’m a straight A student.
    “I don’t talk every second of the day! I have tons of time where I’m silent!”
    “Oh, so basically when you put your headphones and ignore the entire lesson?”  I remark a bit too cruel.
    “Asshole.” I pretend to be annoyed by him but in reality I always thought Mikuo was adorable when he was angry. His expression is priceless.
    “C’mon Luki, we gotta go.” I hear Luka’s voice as she approaches me. I quickly get up, and soon after we say our goodbyes and leave.

My life is going to get stranger now, isn't it?