Frozen Blossoms

Chapter 3: Hudson waterfall

9:07 AM: Cindy walk through the halls of her workplace holding tears from brimming from her eyes. Most assistants keeps their head down but the few who have the courage to watch her, nod and give a sad smile. Her head swings high and she forces a smile onto her face.

9:14 AM: She refuses to allow her professional and personal life to come crashing in on her but she feels both are quickly suffocating her. Her trembling body takes quick paces towards the exit but the more she walks, the further the door is. Cindy is greeted by small whisper of winds under her ear as she swings the door open from her work place.

9:22 AM: Cindy sad face soon blends with the oncoming crowd of the city. People surround her speak endlessly to other people and on their phones. The scent of fresh bread and the smoke of an old bus took her senses away for a moment. She tries to smile but she could not bring herself too. She feels the new knowledge she received yesterday is weighing on her heart and mind.

9:34 AM: She walks mindlessly towards the river that splits apart Long Island and New York City. She tucks in her hair and pulls her skirt down to reach her knees. Her lips quiver and her brows frown. The wind picks up her hair when she approaches the river and the scent of water invades her nose.

9:54 AM: She walked five thousand steps towards Riverside Park on West 79th Street. She makes certain not to step onto the cracks in-between the bustling crowd. She fixes her blouse so its constantly aligned with her skirt.

9:55 AM: Cindy sits on one of the many benches aligning the Hudson river with her legs crossed and eyes staring into New Jersey. Her thoughts are far from where she sits. She inhales the sea-water scent from the river and finally allows this week to enter into my mind. They come like razors piercing through her thoughts. The first thought that creeps up into her mind is an image of the letter. The letter is neatly creased and hiding away in her home. Her mouth sour at the context within its creased paper.

10:03 AM: She feels anxious and terrified at the fact listed on paper. Her long term goals were dwindling.

The edges of my lips hanged realizing if the letter is accurate then having a once bright future looked very dim. In the same second a second painful bitter-sweet thought came into her mind - my ex. Her eyes are wide when water started to stream down like a waterfall.

10:02, no, 10:03 she scrambles her brain. She thinks and thinks - 'I honestly wanted a future with this one. I wanted children and a house with this one. I allowed John fully into my life on hope he would reciprocate but I was always denied into his by distractions he crafted. I told the world about him, I was so proud to have such a wonderful boyfriend while I was kept a secret in his life. Ironically he called me today to break up with me while I wanted to tell him about the letter, both terrible news for me. I felt like curling up in my bed when every moment we spent together barged into my mind allowing for the waterworks to come pouring down.'

She cries for hours and hours in a crowded city but no soul pays her any mind. New Yorkers are too busy working to pay bills they are going to die with and she is gracious for this. She continues to rattle her brain thinking of ways to cope, to handle whatever she is going through. Her toes starts to move. Her hands covers her head and grates through her hair. -

'10:08? 10:19? 10:23?: Now that I have no income, will I be able to afford to live where my bed resides? No. Why did that even come up as a question in my head? Then again, what would it matter? I cannot go back to my old life. I cannot afford it. I want to leave on better terms with myself. I already started with my job. Now, for the rest of my life. I won't be here for long.