Rape

Message

In real life rape happens everyday. Sometimes people go through sexual violence for years and they don't even realize it, and you don't realize because a part of you doesn't accept it because it's disgusting and you are afraid of what happened.
You tell yourself "no, that doesn't happen to me, I'm normal" and you convince yourself of it more and more everyday.
You simply live your life wondering why the fuck you cry for no reason, why the fuck you're not confident about your body at all, why the fuck when you're touched you feel violated, why the fuck you're scared of people, why the fuck you're so weak, so different.
You experienced sexual violence.
In the moment you realize it your life changes, you change, and no matter how many panic attacks come after that realization, you're now starting to heal.
And yes, it hurts, it hurts because it's a pain inside your chest and there's no way to let it out, you just cry and look at your body and you feel like you wanna run away from it but you're stuck, and you wanna scream.
You feel like you just wanna live again and be "normal".
You ask yourself "why me?"
Because you're just a human and you don't deserve it.
You just wanna heal.
You know how you heal? Accepting what happened, you never heal ignoring, but remembering and crying a little less everytime.
You heal by waking up for those nightmares a little bit less scared every night.
And god knows how much you'll be crying.
You can't say it, because you're ashamed of yourself, even if you did nothing.
You did nothing, you didn't ask for it.
You feel weak and small and you hate that feeling, you don't wanna be seen as a person who went trough that.
You don't want to be pathetic.
You don't wanna tell someone because you feel like you'll just cry.
But people need to know to help.
And I know you feel alone.
So maybe if you knew you aren't alone, and you aren't, because there's too many people who go trough that, you'll see how to help yourself.
You're aren't alone, you can heal, because we are stronger.
We are stronger than you think.