I could just start explaining what happened to me in a lot of ways but really I think the best way is just to start.
It was a cold winter’s day; I was standing on Heacham beach with a tear rolling done my face that I swear would freeze any second. You never think it will happen to you, or anyone else in your family, until it happens. I’m young, I’m healthy but yet it’s still happened. I wipe away the tear annoyed that there’s a crack in my armour, a weakness that’s showing to the world.
I don’t know how long I can stay here I love the beach but mum worries more now she only went to the shop anyway. Mums already back, I’m sure of it. Oh well she won’t yell now. I brush my hair out of my eyes and start to work my way back across the deserted beach thinking only of how things can change in a blink of an eye. Just one week ago I had been a normal 15 year old girl, now what? I wasn’t the dancer or gymnast, I wasn’t the music lover or huge TV fan I had been before. I still was inside but now, on the outside, to everybody it seemed I was the girl with cancer.
It’s that word, you can’t escape it, it’s everywhere. Adds on the TV, scary posters, on websites, people doing fun runs and handing out badges, you can never escape it. When you say it to someone you can see them change, and when you say you have it things can only get worse. People can’t help how they react they just do it, like an instinct. You can see the pity seep into there eyes and the questions forming on there tongue.
You see them differently to, suddenly there the lucky ones, you know that they will hurt seeing you hurt but there the ones who get to live and who don’t have to worry about there hair falling out and dying. You wish you were them; you don’t want to have to go through it, through all the pain that’s bound to come and not knowing where it will end.
It’s just like that, you can’t avoid it. Mums different around me and, though I hate to admit it, my friends are. They change the minute you tell them, Its an instant reaction and you cant stop it. No matter what they say, they will support you but they still change around you, some leave you, others become clingy, always asking you how you are.
only told them two days ago, but I’ve seen them change already, and I haven’t told them everything yet. I haven’t been told everything yet.
